Ray's Thought for the Day - The Meaningless Annual Precipitation Total
Dad gum it. I need to leave weather prognosticating to the ovates. I figured my annual total would stand up, but there was I, happily yanking up bur clovers when the rain sent me skittering along inside. So yet again, anon, I shall have to update the dang meaningless annual total. I need to come up with a scientifically and Druidically based system that will lend some meaning to all this statistical confusion.
Uh oh. A DNS alert is coming in.
US Culture Today!!!! A Newsy News Feature intermittently provided by the Druid News Service (DNS). We're Fixing to Hang US, a Mammonite.
Land sakes alive! Hello boys and regular people. This is Ms. Hope Remains, Ace Reporter coming at you live from Miserable Baghdad, the Miserable Capital of Occupied Miserable Iraq. Praise the Goddess, we are fixing to hang US a Mammonite.
Goodness gracious! Any day now our brave interrogators shall turn the hapless former potentate of miserable Iraq, Saddam, over to the miserable Iraqi government. The miserable Iraqi government shall then hang that Mammonite from a gallows just like poor Tom Dooley was formerly hung. And just like poor Tom Dooley, Saddam the Mammonite, is bound to die, sooner or later.
Yep. Saddam the Hapless Mammonite has been fairly tried, maybe, and convicted of being a mass murderer. One theoretical justification for hanging him high is that other local Mammonite potentates will learn something or other from Saddam's fate and not murder a bunch of potential hired hands without checking with the global Mammonite potentates, first. Maybe this will make the local Mammonite potentates nervous, but maybe not. Whatever.
Boom!
Goodness gracious! Fireworks! The miserable Iraqis are celebrating. OK. The DNS is about to have our electricity cut off. And since the WG abandoned this habitat long ago, I need to bug out. Where shall I go from here? Easy that, the White Palace, headquarters of Our Ignoramus Kinglet. This is Ms. Hope Remains, Ace Reporter, signing off. Watch out for the Wicker Man!!!!
_____
All righty then. Hope shall return to the Homeland, anon. I always worry when she's off in foreign parts. Especially parts abandoned by the WG long ago. Meantime, my sister and Crumby have finished RAYETTA'S BUTTERFLY CHECKLIST FOR THE CB, the blank version. It should be good for blocks around the CB, featuring every butterfly collected in Travis County since Heck was a Pup. Oddly, my sister and my bosom companion are not fussing like formerly. Er. Both Crumby and Rayetta are prone to be fastidious. What the heck are they up to?
Uh oh. A DNS alert is coming in.
US Culture Today!!!! A Newsy News Feature intermittently provided by the Druid News Service (DNS). We're Fixing to Hang US, a Mammonite.
Land sakes alive! Hello boys and regular people. This is Ms. Hope Remains, Ace Reporter coming at you live from Miserable Baghdad, the Miserable Capital of Occupied Miserable Iraq. Praise the Goddess, we are fixing to hang US a Mammonite.
Goodness gracious! Any day now our brave interrogators shall turn the hapless former potentate of miserable Iraq, Saddam, over to the miserable Iraqi government. The miserable Iraqi government shall then hang that Mammonite from a gallows just like poor Tom Dooley was formerly hung. And just like poor Tom Dooley, Saddam the Mammonite, is bound to die, sooner or later.
Yep. Saddam the Hapless Mammonite has been fairly tried, maybe, and convicted of being a mass murderer. One theoretical justification for hanging him high is that other local Mammonite potentates will learn something or other from Saddam's fate and not murder a bunch of potential hired hands without checking with the global Mammonite potentates, first. Maybe this will make the local Mammonite potentates nervous, but maybe not. Whatever.
Boom!
Goodness gracious! Fireworks! The miserable Iraqis are celebrating. OK. The DNS is about to have our electricity cut off. And since the WG abandoned this habitat long ago, I need to bug out. Where shall I go from here? Easy that, the White Palace, headquarters of Our Ignoramus Kinglet. This is Ms. Hope Remains, Ace Reporter, signing off. Watch out for the Wicker Man!!!!
_____
All righty then. Hope shall return to the Homeland, anon. I always worry when she's off in foreign parts. Especially parts abandoned by the WG long ago. Meantime, my sister and Crumby have finished RAYETTA'S BUTTERFLY CHECKLIST FOR THE CB, the blank version. It should be good for blocks around the CB, featuring every butterfly collected in Travis County since Heck was a Pup. Oddly, my sister and my bosom companion are not fussing like formerly. Er. Both Crumby and Rayetta are prone to be fastidious. What the heck are they up to?
posted by ray pistrum at Friday, December 29, 2006
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