The Prodigal Spartan

For years beyond count as tiny planet Earth metaphorically  circled round and round Ogma Sunface many times, Crumby relied upon his Spartan or his Tinker for sak surety.   Most recently it was the Tinker that succored Crumby. But sadly, that Tinker was lost in Alaska maybe, and shall never be seen again, alas, probably.  However, an average person may never know for sure if a sak is lost or lost lost.

Because Crumby's Spartan that Crumby had not espied in Goddess knows how long (which is why Crumby was relying exclusively upon the Tinker) somehow found its way into the pocket of a pair of Crumby's slender pants where it has apparently been residing an unimaginable depth or length of time since Crumby got too fat for those particular slender pants.  But now that Spartan is found and foremost on Crumby's consciousness.

Spartan
Explorer
Outdoorsman

                                


By the way, the names of saks are odd.  Like I can see why the Tinker would need a Phillips.  But why then does the otherwise identical Spartan need a corkscrew instead of a Phillips?  And why does the Mountaineer have a metal file?  While the Motorist features a wood saw.  And what about this goofiness;  Scientist-Passenger-Yeoman, all similar but with additional tools added from left to right.   It's crazy.

Plus, the only way you can ever know the crazy name for your model of sac is to keep the package or box it came in.  Cause the names are not on the knives, anywhere.  And even the package or box may not have the right name.  Like one of my sac boxes is a generic box that lists several models that could potentially go with that box.  Crazy I tell you.

Yet so far, the sacs we are discussing are just Victorinox sacs.   If Wenger sac names are included too, forget it.  Too crazy.  Since the names are so crazy anyway, Crumby may rename his sacs.  Midget, Whoremonger, Lazy Dog are some common names Crumby is considering.