The Adventures of Blodeuwedd
One day a very great while back, far in excess of a tousand or even two tousand turns of the wheel, the White Goddess (WG) noticed that two of her Druids were messin' around with some of Her little wonders, and great was their fidgetin' and agitation. These two Druids, Math Son of Mathonwy and Gwydion Son of Don, were, as She noticed, attemptin' to magic some of Her little wonders into a maiden fair. Perhaps they were magicin' sugar and spice and everything nice, but perhaps not. In any event, the WG said to Herself, "Hmmm, I shall play along with these Druids because I am curious about what they are up to." And that's just what the WG did, play along with the two Druids.
Meantime Math and Gwydion were workin' and arguin' over which of the little wonders to combine and how to assemble the maiden fair and they were proceedin' by trial and error with much waving of wands, directed at first one combination of little wonders and then another. Occasionally the wicker woman they were assemblin' would give a twitch and Math and Gwydion would get all lathered up thinking they had accomplished their conjurin', but the twitches were just the WG giving and taking away and the wicker woman never quite sprang to full fruition. After many trials and failures Math and Gwydion waxed quarrelsome and each began to blame the other for the slow progress with the wicker woman. But then, in the midst of the bickerin', Math bein' agitated and full of the spirit, had an epiphany, which was, not sugar, spice and everything nice; but oak (Quercus petraea, Fagaceae, broom (Cytisus scoparia), Fabaceae, and meadowsweet (Spiraraea ulmaira) Rosaceae. "These three of the little wonders are what's required", Math declared, and Gwydion went along with Math and Math's epiphany because he was outranked and hadn't had an epiphany of his own.
Also, because he was outranked, Gwydion was dispatched to find these items of little wonders and they were common plants in those days at that time and are still around in those same parts today. So Gwydion soon collected the requisite specimens in two shakes of a lamb's tail, or actually, a little longer, and he took those specimens back to where Math was recoverin' from his, Math's epiphany, and was havin' a Dolmen er two. Gwydion was hot and thirsty, having done lotsa collectin' and desired a Dolmen er two also, but Math didn't want to share so they fussed and waved wands over the remainder of the 12 pack. But lo eventually, Math fell asleep from the rigours of his epiphany in combination with the several Dolmens he had drunk up, plus the wand wavin' he had to accomplish to ward Gwydion off the 12 pack, and when Math dozed off, Gwydion, was at liberty to guzzle up the remaining Dolmen's, which he did do, guzzle them up, and Gwydion went nappy-bye too.
The WG, of course, had been watchin' all these Druidic shenanigans, and also had seen where Gwydion had dropped his specimen bag, which by the way, was a fine wool specimen bag dyed blue with woad (Isatis tinctoria), Apiaceae. So thinking it would be lotsa fun, the WG entered into the specimen bag, gave a wriggle er two and transformed the specimen bag and the specimens inside the specimen bag into the most beautiful human woman ever seen in those parts. Then, off She went, explorin'.
After an undetermined while, Math and Gwydion arose from their naps and once the fog cleared and their surroundings became apparent, to 'em, they began to appreciate that Gwydion's specimen bag was entirely disappeared together with the contents of the specimen bag and they were in despair, believing that some other Druid had enchanted the specimen bag and whisked it away, or they had been robbed of it by the ignorant and vulgar. So, disconsolately, and since a long day was nearing its end, and after performing ablutions, they set off to find lodging for the nightly nonce at, Math's castle.
Trudging up hill, with backs bowed and heads down the two Druids fared along, less than merrily, 'til about sundown, and eventually came to the top of the hill they were trudgin' upon and from which Math's castle could be espied a short distance away, on the next hill north. Now this hill they were on was curious for the fact that it had a great Dolmen atop it(the very Dolmen for which Dolmen Stout was named)and the Dolmen of concern sat in a little clearing immediately adjacent to the trail Math and Gwydion had been trudgin' up. So naturally they stopped to catch wind and Gwydion took this opportunity to pass wind and the twain Druids just as naturally looked over at the Dolmen, because it was a famous landmark, and lo, sitting on the Dolmen was the most beautiful human woman those Druids had ever espied, and they were spooked.
But the WG, in her guise as the most beautiful human woman ever, spoke unto the Druids and the staves She spoke were, "Hello boys".
_____
to be continued..............
by Nancy, the Goddess of Practical Jokes
Meantime Math and Gwydion were workin' and arguin' over which of the little wonders to combine and how to assemble the maiden fair and they were proceedin' by trial and error with much waving of wands, directed at first one combination of little wonders and then another. Occasionally the wicker woman they were assemblin' would give a twitch and Math and Gwydion would get all lathered up thinking they had accomplished their conjurin', but the twitches were just the WG giving and taking away and the wicker woman never quite sprang to full fruition. After many trials and failures Math and Gwydion waxed quarrelsome and each began to blame the other for the slow progress with the wicker woman. But then, in the midst of the bickerin', Math bein' agitated and full of the spirit, had an epiphany, which was, not sugar, spice and everything nice; but oak (Quercus petraea, Fagaceae, broom (Cytisus scoparia), Fabaceae, and meadowsweet (Spiraraea ulmaira) Rosaceae. "These three of the little wonders are what's required", Math declared, and Gwydion went along with Math and Math's epiphany because he was outranked and hadn't had an epiphany of his own.
Also, because he was outranked, Gwydion was dispatched to find these items of little wonders and they were common plants in those days at that time and are still around in those same parts today. So Gwydion soon collected the requisite specimens in two shakes of a lamb's tail, or actually, a little longer, and he took those specimens back to where Math was recoverin' from his, Math's epiphany, and was havin' a Dolmen er two. Gwydion was hot and thirsty, having done lotsa collectin' and desired a Dolmen er two also, but Math didn't want to share so they fussed and waved wands over the remainder of the 12 pack. But lo eventually, Math fell asleep from the rigours of his epiphany in combination with the several Dolmens he had drunk up, plus the wand wavin' he had to accomplish to ward Gwydion off the 12 pack, and when Math dozed off, Gwydion, was at liberty to guzzle up the remaining Dolmen's, which he did do, guzzle them up, and Gwydion went nappy-bye too.
The WG, of course, had been watchin' all these Druidic shenanigans, and also had seen where Gwydion had dropped his specimen bag, which by the way, was a fine wool specimen bag dyed blue with woad (Isatis tinctoria), Apiaceae. So thinking it would be lotsa fun, the WG entered into the specimen bag, gave a wriggle er two and transformed the specimen bag and the specimens inside the specimen bag into the most beautiful human woman ever seen in those parts. Then, off She went, explorin'.
After an undetermined while, Math and Gwydion arose from their naps and once the fog cleared and their surroundings became apparent, to 'em, they began to appreciate that Gwydion's specimen bag was entirely disappeared together with the contents of the specimen bag and they were in despair, believing that some other Druid had enchanted the specimen bag and whisked it away, or they had been robbed of it by the ignorant and vulgar. So, disconsolately, and since a long day was nearing its end, and after performing ablutions, they set off to find lodging for the nightly nonce at, Math's castle.
Trudging up hill, with backs bowed and heads down the two Druids fared along, less than merrily, 'til about sundown, and eventually came to the top of the hill they were trudgin' upon and from which Math's castle could be espied a short distance away, on the next hill north. Now this hill they were on was curious for the fact that it had a great Dolmen atop it(the very Dolmen for which Dolmen Stout was named)and the Dolmen of concern sat in a little clearing immediately adjacent to the trail Math and Gwydion had been trudgin' up. So naturally they stopped to catch wind and Gwydion took this opportunity to pass wind and the twain Druids just as naturally looked over at the Dolmen, because it was a famous landmark, and lo, sitting on the Dolmen was the most beautiful human woman those Druids had ever espied, and they were spooked.
But the WG, in her guise as the most beautiful human woman ever, spoke unto the Druids and the staves She spoke were, "Hello boys".
_____
to be continued..............
by Nancy, the Goddess of Practical Jokes
posted by ray pistrum at Saturday, September 17, 2005
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