Newsflash! - Druid News Service (DNS) - the LDR Correspondin' from Dubai

Good morning and a lovely day is portending. Lomo! Put the camera on me! That's better.

Now as I, the LDR was spelling, a semi-lovely day is portending, maybe. We are on location here in semi-beautiful Dubai, the capital city, perhaps, of the United Arab Emirates. Dubai is not the sleepy little Arab town of the past, but a bustling metropolis of new roads and ***** high rise hotels everywhere. And indeed as I gaze about, hither and yon, in truth, I do espy a great many cranes, all busy craning about the numerous high rise buildings.

But putting the cranes aside for the nonce, whoa!. Lomo, pan over that way. One of those cranes is toppling over. Yes, yes. Can every one see that crane toppling over? How exciting is that for a DNS exclusive? Hmmmm. Perhaps someone got hurt when it hit that skyscraper. Oh well.

We are here today at the Emirates Golf Course, which in addition to its ranking as an internationally renowned golf course, frequented by many of our very own ruling class linksters, is also a Mecca for international birdwatchers. Let me just check the Log and see what international birders are in attendance enjoying the golf course avifauna today. My goodness! Apparently the Copenhagen Coots Retired Ladies Birding Club is present today. Aren't they an intrepid bunch! Lomo, put the camera on those old ladies over there, the ones running along in tennis shoes. Isn't that cute. They are trying to get a closer look at a citerine wagtail. Lomo, zoom in on the citerine wagtail. No, no, no, Lomo, that's a jack snipe. The wagtail is over there in that thingy bush that looks like a mesquite. Shoot! All righty then, never mind the wagtail. Jeez Louise! Cut fer a minute Lomo. I'm hotter'n beezlebub inside this dang babooska or whutever they call this dang outfit. If I can just get this thing off fer a minute, Ahhhhhhhhh! Air.

All righty then. Oops, how do I get this thing back on! Lomo, here comes Mr. Mohotmoo, the head groundskeeper for the golf course. Lomo! Put the camera on Mr. Mohotmoo. Mr, Mohotmoo, yoohoo, Mr. Mohotmoo, look over here please. It's me-ee, Rayetta of the DNS here for the interview. Ha! Here he comes.

Hello Mr. Mohotmoo. It was so kind of you to take time away from your busy schedule. No doubt, maintaining the links in such a climate is no easy task?

Yes indeed Ms. Rayetta. This is not like India where I come from. It rains in India. But the rain deities have looooong forsaken this place. It is a desert and no place for a Hindu like me.

Then why do you stay here Mr. Mohotmoo?

Oh my goodness. The Arabs have a great deal of money to pay Mohotmoo, and they do not work themselves, but yet they wish for lovely green links in this terrible desert place, and for that they pay Mohotmoo much money. Yes indeed.

I see Mr. Mohotmoo. And when you have enough money, what will you do?

Oh Ms. Rayetta. I shall most certainly return to my native India, where it rains.

Interesting Mr. Mohotmoo. What is the most challenging part of your job here at the Emirates Golf Course?

Oh my goodness Ms. Rayetta. There are many challenges, but the foremost of these is the sprinkler system. It is thirsty grass and hot, so the sprinklers must be kept in perfect working order. This is a very great challenge for Mohotmoo, for the international birders may become excited and kick over a sprinkler head. So then Mohotmoo must repair that sprinkler head. But soon the international birders may become very excited indeed and kick over a great many other sprinkler heads. So poor Mohotmoo is kept very very busy.

Goodness! That does sound busy. My goodness gracious sakes, those birders should watch out for those sprinkler heads. Say Mohotmoo, and just between us twain Goddess worshippers, do you ever turn the sprinklers on for fun?

Oh yes Ms. Rayetta. That is very much fun indeed and cheers up a poor Hindu very much in this dreadful place.

Well thank you Mr. Mohotmoo. And if you wish, you can turn a sprinkler on, on me, for I am a roast in this outfit and the sweat pooling in my shoes is most unladylike. This is the LDR, signing off on behalf of the DNS from the Emirates Golf Course in Dubai.

Cut Lomo! Let's get the lala out of this lala hole!