Ray's Thought for the Day - Ray and Olwen 10

Ray drove on in, honking happily, wavin’ out the window at the Kinglet’s many minions rushin’ about on their many minion duties, for the hum of minion industry was much apparent within the fence of the Kinglet’s palace. The Crown Vic halted, as was its wont and nature, at exactly the right spot on the lawn in front of the palace and Ray got out to stretch and inquire of one or another of the many minions rushing about where the nearest comfort was located.

“Where’s the nearest dang comfort station,” hollered Ray at an approaching group of minions, “I am much in need of performing a particular ablution, for I have drunk up a six pack of RCs on the way to these parts from the parts I was at a-fore, and I am verily in need of an ablution performance arena, anon.”

So great was the power and urgency of Ray’s spell that all the nearby minions focused in on Ray and his need and each in its own way gave out diverse directions to the nearest comfort stations, some pointing this a-way and some that a-way, and all chattering away.

“All righty then, if ye caint co-ordinate yer response collectively and rationally, I shall perform my ablution right here, in the privacy afforded twixt the Crown Vic and yonder rose bush.” And as any man of action Ray would, Ray began fixing to do just what he said. But then, lo, upon the scene appeared another, and from the grinning and curtseying and forelock tugging his appearance engendered among the minions, Ray deemed he was a person of some importance in those parts.

“What are ye fixing to do there young man?”

“I am fixing to perform a needful ablution, for I have drunk up a six pack of RCs since my last ablution.”

“Ye may not perform ablutions out here on the lawn. That would be unprecedented. Come with me and you may perform an ablution in the ablution performance area adjacent to mine own Oval Office. That is a very famous ablution performance area and will more than meet with all your own ablution requirements.”

“All righty then. But we need to move along to that area then, expeditiously.”

So then the twain of them, both Ray and the important man headed inside expeditiously and soon Ray found himself happily performing an ablution in a very nice comfort station”.

“Ah, that call was a close un, too close, for indeed I have wetted myself, slightly. Do ye perchance have some spare undears handy for mine spares are betimes in the trunk of the Crown Vic?" Ray hollered from the comfort station.

“Hmmm, my first cousin requires dry undears and here comes the Rumpler with his undears on his head,” surmised the Kinglet, for this man of importance was indeed the very Kinglet, Ray sought. “Gimme those undears off your noggin, Rumpler!”

“No! Even the Kinglet may not have the undears off my noggin.”

“Give them me. My own first cousin, Ray, is there in the very famous Oval Office comfort station and has wetted his own undears slightly and requires a dry pair.”

“No. For these particular undears are special. These undears are not merely undears, but also symbolic of the great power and prestige due to the state of affairs.”

“Give them me anyway Rumpler. Here then, I’ll just grab em off your dern old noggin. Heh, heh.”

"Noooooo Kinglet. Please don’t take my souvenir undears!"

“Now then Rumpler, go along on your important duties and if you wish you can go fetch another pair of undears for you own noggin, for I know you have a great supply.”

“All righty then, snuffle. If the Kinglet requires my souvenir undears, it must be for the best.” And Rumpler slouched off, grumpy and tearful, for his feelings were hurt.

“Ray, open the door a mite, for I have here a dry pair of undears.”

“Why thank ye. Give them me and I shall switch out. Whoa! These are mite oily, but only on one side. Ha! Dry undears.