The wepubwican wevolwution - Boring Political Commentary by Mr. Red Ears, Translated into English by Dr. Rayetta Pistrum, Ph. D.

The republican revolution is a continuing major success, having achieved its goal of rendering the US government dysfunctional in all areas save one. That one most important area of success, the disbursement of everyone’s tax money to republican revolutionaries and their ruling class sponsors, has worked out swell. Yippee!!!!

Many complain that the republican revolutionaries promised to down-size big government and end big governments intrusion into our private lives.. Yet the government, under the republican revolutionaries grew bigger than ever, and way more potentially intrusive. But that’s OK. Though the government is way bigger than ever, it’s also hopelessly dysfunctional. So the chance that it will actually intrude into anyone’s life, or mess up their way of life, especially the life of a republican revolutionary, or the way of life of a ruling class republican revolutionary sponsor, is incredibly remote. But accidents do happen.

Happily, even though bigger government is dysfunctional, the revolutionary republicans have brought private industry in to fix things up. Private industry is just that, industry performed in private. It’s great because nobody can see what you’re up to. You could maybe need a hard-earned break from your private industry, and spend a couple of hours in the Port-a-Can, simultaneously socking a thousand tax dollars an hour away, and no one would know the difference. It’s private industry. And since the government is dysfunctional, nobody will check up on you, probably.

Yepper. Down here in Tejas, the republican revolutionaries are totally jubilant, wallowing in the success of their revolution. Soon, Tejas shall achieve independence, again, assuming a rightful position as the globe’s most electrified sovereign third-world country or whatever.