Crumby on the Job - Rainout

My job, bird enumeration, has rules. These rules, like in the pirate movies, are more like guidelines. One of the rules or guidelines is, if it is raining, you can not enumerate the birds, efficaciously. However, the guidelines leave it up to the professional judgement of the bird enumerator as to whether the rain is apt to hinder efficacious bird enumeration.

Today I used my best professional judgement and concluded that the rain was fixing to make bird enumeration less than efficacious. But I made that best professional judgement only after I had toted this and that around from this or that spot to some other spot and driven around a good deal in the trusty Tahoe when I could have been suppine on the ample bosoms, instead. Plus I got rained on.

My personal inclination is to do bird enumeration regardless of the potential for rain. That is partly because past experience indicates that a shower or two may promote bird enumeration. On the other hand, a great many bird enumerators, historically, have suffered electrocution from playing their tape recorders in the rain. I certainly do not wish to be enumerated among all those unfortunate victims of the Demon Electricity.

These days with the Demon Electricity promoting all sorts of new gadgetry, the electrocution toll among bird enumerators must be rising dramatically. How many bird enumerators have been electrocuted by their cell phones or GPS units? Nobody knows!

That's right! Nobody knows! Nobody knows what terminated all those unfortunate bird enumerators. That is because, when you get electrocuted out in the wilderness, days or even years can pass before your bleached, gnawed bones are discovered next to your cell phone.

What happened to this poor soul? Why didn't he use his cell phone to call for help? Mercy!