Sons O’ Bitches
At this very nonce, thousands, if not hundreds, of tall goldenrods are fixing to bloom at the CB. Crumby is, consequently, very happy and very busy. Because the goldenrods attract a great many insects. And Crumby is at his very happiest when espying a good many new insects amid a great many insects. Like Crumby was thinking, This may be the happiest time ever. I get to espy all this new stuff without ever leaving the yard. It’s like the miracle Jesus promised but never delivered on.
Anyway, suddenly Crumby noticed that one of the green lynx spiders, not Fatty, had caught a very interesting fly. Since the picture of the fly we are talking about is an out of focus (OOF) load of crap, Crumby shall have to describe this particular fly, employing a thousand words or less.
It is a large fly, about an inch long from the tip of the snout to its sphincter. Uh. OK. Everything else you can maybe espy on your own. You may espy, for example, using your imagination, that it has yellow feet or perhaps yellow socks.
Because all the pictures came out OOF, Crumby decided that the spider needed to give that particular large fly to Crumby. You have had that fly long enough. Turn it a loose, Crumby ordered.
No, says the spider. I aint done with this particular fly.
All righty then, says Crumby, you have sucked all the juice out of that dern fly and I want the rest of it. Give it to me, or I shall employ my tweezers on it.
No, no, no. You may not have my delicious fly.
Crumby was shocked by the strength and tenacity of that dang spider. No matter how Crumby tugged on the tweezers the spider would not let go of its fly. Plus, soon as Crumby lost his tweezer grip, that spider zoomed off at super-sonic speed, towing its fly along. Crumby gave up, temporarily.
I shall come back later, spider, when you have dropped that particular fly.
Crumby came back later. There sat the spider with a new victim a Scolia dubia. Crumby looked and looked under the spider perch, but could not find the fly. Sadly, a decent picture of that particular fly is now unlikely. Sons o' bitches!
Hugely important addendum: Maybe an extra large feather-legged fly with bright yellow feet. Are there really only six species of North American Trichopoda?
Anyway, suddenly Crumby noticed that one of the green lynx spiders, not Fatty, had caught a very interesting fly. Since the picture of the fly we are talking about is an out of focus (OOF) load of crap, Crumby shall have to describe this particular fly, employing a thousand words or less.
It is a large fly, about an inch long from the tip of the snout to its sphincter. Uh. OK. Everything else you can maybe espy on your own. You may espy, for example, using your imagination, that it has yellow feet or perhaps yellow socks. Because all the pictures came out OOF, Crumby decided that the spider needed to give that particular large fly to Crumby. You have had that fly long enough. Turn it a loose, Crumby ordered.
No, says the spider. I aint done with this particular fly.
All righty then, says Crumby, you have sucked all the juice out of that dern fly and I want the rest of it. Give it to me, or I shall employ my tweezers on it.
No, no, no. You may not have my delicious fly.
Crumby was shocked by the strength and tenacity of that dang spider. No matter how Crumby tugged on the tweezers the spider would not let go of its fly. Plus, soon as Crumby lost his tweezer grip, that spider zoomed off at super-sonic speed, towing its fly along. Crumby gave up, temporarily.
I shall come back later, spider, when you have dropped that particular fly.
Crumby came back later. There sat the spider with a new victim a Scolia dubia. Crumby looked and looked under the spider perch, but could not find the fly. Sadly, a decent picture of that particular fly is now unlikely. Sons o' bitches!
Hugely important addendum: Maybe an extra large feather-legged fly with bright yellow feet. Are there really only six species of North American Trichopoda?
posted by ray pistrum at Sunday, September 26, 2010
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