Bird House
Four different species of birds have come into the human and proto human residence areas of the Cow Barn, to date. These are Bewick's wren, Carolina wren, great-tailed grackle and northern cardinal. The wrens just pop in and find their ways back out with no trouble. The grackles come in, get into the pet food and water dishes, crap all over everthing and have to be captured and forcibly evicted. But today, for the first time a cardinal came in.
This is the manner of the cardinal coming in. He came flying along lickety split, hit a sliding glass door, ricochetted (two ts is OK) off the sliding glass door and fetched up behind a large and heavy and tall cabinet decorated in an Egyptian motif like a sarcophagous that contains most of the RGVECB electric entertainment devices and will eventually be recycled as a coffin. I, the Crumby Ovate saw this and thought, "Will this little wonder be more like a wren or more like a grackle?"
Note that the Crumby Ovate did not actually do anything, yet. Rather he continued, as previously, to recline in his LAZY BOY recliner, reflecting on a miserable half day at the ****, and nursing various stress induced maladies including a headache and an upset stomach, and impatiently awaiting the Alka Seltzer to kick in. About 15 minutes elapsed with the CO in situ in his LAZY BOY, grumpy and annoyed, and watching The Daily Show (repressive desublimation on steroids) when the CO heard a thump from behind him in the kitchen.
Groan! But the CO still didn't actually do anything except get up out of the LAZY BOY and open the sliding glass door to maximum openness and check on the whereabouts of the dogs and cat. Then he went back to getting repressivlely desublimated by the TV. But then he started to hear more thumps and pretty soon the thumps took on a visual significance as the red bird thumped onto a precarious perch on a picture frame. Groan!
"Pretty bird, fly on out the door now. See! It's wide open!"
Thump......Thump......................Thump. Groan!
Clearly, this particular redbird was addlepated from its collision with the sliding glass door and needed some assistance egressing which it obviously wanted to do, egress. Groan! So the CO got up out of his LAZY BOY AGAIN (Groan!)and proceeded to follow the thumps round and about the human and proto human residence area. Now you may not think so, but the CO has a knack for catching birds out of the air with his bare hands, but this time the knack never came into play because the redbird eventually thumped under an end table in the living room and there the CO pounced on him. And from the time the CO had the redbird in hand until the time the CO opened the front door and released the redbird and the redbird took wing, he, the redbird, never stopped squeaking. The CO, who habitually counts everything, counted 69 redbird squeaks while the redbird was in his, the COs, hand.
The manner in which the cardinal was like grackles is that he didn't egress by himself. The manner in which the cardinal was like wrens is that he didn't crap all over the house.
The CO never did start feeling better so eventually he took abed and the White Goddess sent dreams, mostly of the comfort of the thighs variety, to comfort him, but also one of the totem variety. And this is what She explained to the CO in the totem dream, "Though you be trapped in a place that is evil for you, keep squeaking and I will hear you and rescue you." And that's what She did do, so today I feel all better.
This is the manner of the cardinal coming in. He came flying along lickety split, hit a sliding glass door, ricochetted (two ts is OK) off the sliding glass door and fetched up behind a large and heavy and tall cabinet decorated in an Egyptian motif like a sarcophagous that contains most of the RGVECB electric entertainment devices and will eventually be recycled as a coffin. I, the Crumby Ovate saw this and thought, "Will this little wonder be more like a wren or more like a grackle?"
Note that the Crumby Ovate did not actually do anything, yet. Rather he continued, as previously, to recline in his LAZY BOY recliner, reflecting on a miserable half day at the ****, and nursing various stress induced maladies including a headache and an upset stomach, and impatiently awaiting the Alka Seltzer to kick in. About 15 minutes elapsed with the CO in situ in his LAZY BOY, grumpy and annoyed, and watching The Daily Show (repressive desublimation on steroids) when the CO heard a thump from behind him in the kitchen.
Groan! But the CO still didn't actually do anything except get up out of the LAZY BOY and open the sliding glass door to maximum openness and check on the whereabouts of the dogs and cat. Then he went back to getting repressivlely desublimated by the TV. But then he started to hear more thumps and pretty soon the thumps took on a visual significance as the red bird thumped onto a precarious perch on a picture frame. Groan!
"Pretty bird, fly on out the door now. See! It's wide open!"
Thump......Thump......................Thump. Groan!
Clearly, this particular redbird was addlepated from its collision with the sliding glass door and needed some assistance egressing which it obviously wanted to do, egress. Groan! So the CO got up out of his LAZY BOY AGAIN (Groan!)and proceeded to follow the thumps round and about the human and proto human residence area. Now you may not think so, but the CO has a knack for catching birds out of the air with his bare hands, but this time the knack never came into play because the redbird eventually thumped under an end table in the living room and there the CO pounced on him. And from the time the CO had the redbird in hand until the time the CO opened the front door and released the redbird and the redbird took wing, he, the redbird, never stopped squeaking. The CO, who habitually counts everything, counted 69 redbird squeaks while the redbird was in his, the COs, hand.
The manner in which the cardinal was like grackles is that he didn't egress by himself. The manner in which the cardinal was like wrens is that he didn't crap all over the house.
The CO never did start feeling better so eventually he took abed and the White Goddess sent dreams, mostly of the comfort of the thighs variety, to comfort him, but also one of the totem variety. And this is what She explained to the CO in the totem dream, "Though you be trapped in a place that is evil for you, keep squeaking and I will hear you and rescue you." And that's what She did do, so today I feel all better.
posted by ray pistrum at Friday, September 30, 2005
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