Ray's Thought for the Day - Ant Day, DY 2
Perhaps the most important secular holiday in these parts is imminently upcoming. Yes. Ant Day is fast approaching. Ant Day is when all the humans in these parts collectively poison the ants. Many may recall that I, Ray, forgot to arrive at the Open House last year, DY 1, when the ant poison was vended. Consequently, I failed of my civic duty to poison my ants in a timely fashion. Yes. I ran out of ant poison. Everyone else poisoned their ants, but I did not poison the CB ants. Consequently, the CB ants probably spread out everywhere in these parts, eventually taking over all the habitats where the other ants got poisoned.
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Dang it! I wish I knew the actual date of Ant Day. Somebody needs to notify me regarding the actual date when I am supposed to poison my ants. I need to be notified. Otherwise, despite not knowing the actual date of Ant Day, as a sighted person can see here, clearly, I am ready. Lesto!
Yepper. I got this new container of ant poison yesterday. So I am ready for Ant Day, whenever Ant Day actually occurs.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, we do not have any Harvester Ants at the CB. As the sighted may discern, my ant poison of preference also kills Harvester Ants, as well as the widely unpopular Fire Ant. Fortunately, I do not have any Harvester Ants. So I do not have to worry about killing them accidentally.
Ants bite or sting me every week. That is correct. The ants afflict me because I am always messing with them. If I let those ants be, they would not bite or sting me so often.
The Fire Ant bites or stings raise little pussy, or maybe pusy, blisters on the afflicted parts. Despite the ghastly appearance of those bites or stings, they do not hurt much, once they go to the pussy or pusy blister stage. But on those rare occasions a Harvester Ant gets a hold of me, they hurt a whole bunch, for hours and hours.
The fact is, if you go eat up a big plate of greasy, cheese enchiladas, then get bit or stung by a Harvester Ant, you are likely to lose your lunch. That is a fact of life many may not be aware of. Yet there it is, a fact of life.
On the other hand, there is far less chance that a baker’s dozen of fire ant bites will cause you to lose your lunch. No. You shall, more than likely, get to keep your lunch.
I am pretty sure that if a Harvester Ant bit me on my weenie, I would die. I doubt, if that terrible occurrence actually occurred, if I could survive, or would even desire to survive. No. That would hurt so much, I would wish myself dead.
Crumby, my bosom companion, claims that he could easily survive a Harvester Ant bite on his weenie. That is because, according to Crumby, he feels less pain than regular mortals. Well, I said, go ahead on. Put a Harvester Ant on yer weenie. Then do something to aggravate that Harvester Ant.
But Crumby said, I am too busy today, thinking, to accomplish that experiment. Go away Ray. I need to think.
Huh-huh!
.jpg)
Dang it! I wish I knew the actual date of Ant Day. Somebody needs to notify me regarding the actual date when I am supposed to poison my ants. I need to be notified. Otherwise, despite not knowing the actual date of Ant Day, as a sighted person can see here, clearly, I am ready. Lesto! Yepper. I got this new container of ant poison yesterday. So I am ready for Ant Day, whenever Ant Day actually occurs.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, we do not have any Harvester Ants at the CB. As the sighted may discern, my ant poison of preference also kills Harvester Ants, as well as the widely unpopular Fire Ant. Fortunately, I do not have any Harvester Ants. So I do not have to worry about killing them accidentally.
Ants bite or sting me every week. That is correct. The ants afflict me because I am always messing with them. If I let those ants be, they would not bite or sting me so often.
The Fire Ant bites or stings raise little pussy, or maybe pusy, blisters on the afflicted parts. Despite the ghastly appearance of those bites or stings, they do not hurt much, once they go to the pussy or pusy blister stage. But on those rare occasions a Harvester Ant gets a hold of me, they hurt a whole bunch, for hours and hours.
The fact is, if you go eat up a big plate of greasy, cheese enchiladas, then get bit or stung by a Harvester Ant, you are likely to lose your lunch. That is a fact of life many may not be aware of. Yet there it is, a fact of life.
On the other hand, there is far less chance that a baker’s dozen of fire ant bites will cause you to lose your lunch. No. You shall, more than likely, get to keep your lunch.
I am pretty sure that if a Harvester Ant bit me on my weenie, I would die. I doubt, if that terrible occurrence actually occurred, if I could survive, or would even desire to survive. No. That would hurt so much, I would wish myself dead.
Crumby, my bosom companion, claims that he could easily survive a Harvester Ant bite on his weenie. That is because, according to Crumby, he feels less pain than regular mortals. Well, I said, go ahead on. Put a Harvester Ant on yer weenie. Then do something to aggravate that Harvester Ant.
But Crumby said, I am too busy today, thinking, to accomplish that experiment. Go away Ray. I need to think.
Huh-huh!
posted by ray pistrum at Sunday, March 02, 2008
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