Tomatoes for a Change

Once in while Crumby runs out of rotten bananas. When that happens, Crumby tries out alternative rotten items. He has tried apples, cantaloupes, peaches, plums, oranges, yams and probably additional foodstuffs that he has forgot about. Yet there is no substitute for bananas. Although, tomatoes are second best. Obviously, these brushfeet are enjoying a little tomato.

Whoa! Crumby wishes he had eschewed the Falangist Daily this morning. Big bad Ricky has purportedly shot a coyote. That’s right. Big Ricky must have contacted the newspaper so he could tell the story about how he shot a coyote by himself. Seems like maybe Ricky was out jogging one morning without his security detail when a coyote looked at his daughter’s dog. So Rick charged the coyote while simultaneously whipping out his piece. According to Rick, it was quick, and the coyote hardly suffered at all.

Mercy! This story should help big Rick out with the nature hater vote. Yes. The majority Booblicans hate nature. So naturally, this type story or tale should have widespread appeal securing many a vote for licky Ricky. Especially since little Ricky is afraid of snakes, his reasoning for packing on a jog in the first place. Huh-huh. Too much.