A Bog and an Addendum

There are not many bogs left in these parts, but this is one that's survived on the Carrizo Sands in the neighborhood of Luling. Most of 'em, the bogs have long been dug up fer their sphagnum moss and dug out to make cattle tanks or whatever. But this is a real bog or purty near to a real bog, located very close to the semi-famous Ottine bogs of botanical and archaeological lore. And if you look carefully at the photo hereabouts, you will, in addition to much very interesting, for these parts, dormant flora, espy boghoppers.
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Addendum

Evangelical zeal among a shrinking subset of the CB Druidry has led us to try and wise up the ignorant and vulgar. So we have, in this venue, shared some of our secrets. One such secret that we have shared is, “What Ovates Do”, do. Recall, that we memorize patterns so that we may predict future events. Also, recall that we can predict future events quite accurately, but our skill at prediction is inversely related to the scale of the event, tiny events being much more difficult to predict than global events. However, sometimes the White Goddess, in One or Another of Her Many Iterations grants us very specific visions into the future pertinent to the tiny and inconsequential. This is one such occasion.

Anon, a bog hopper will be sucked into the muck. Perhaps one of these, maybe, or perhaps some other of their clan. When this happens, that particular bog hopper will assume, “This is very bad day, fer me!” and struggle mightily against the smothering ooze, but to no avail. But cheer up bog hopper, for I, The Crumby Ovate, foresee fame, fer ye, in a great while, anon.

A great while later a presumptive semi-famous anthropologist happens to be nosing about the confines of this very same bog where our original bog hopper got sucked under. “Goodness gracious” she exclaims, “is that a nose snuffling out of the muck, I espy!?!” And sure enough it is the nose of our very same original bog hopper that was sucked down long ago, but the long purview of the erosive processes that are interconnected with, but not the same difference as, time, have revealed this very snuffling nose. “Hark” she further exclaims, “if this indeed be a nose lately preserved against the cruel vicissitudes of time, my semi- fame shall no more rest presumptive, but shall blossom forth, exceedingly! Come hither everyone, for I have made a discovery for the ages, all righty then, and require some assistance, for digging it up and hosing it off.”

Just fer the heck of it, for I’m not sure about the name, let’s spell this particular anthropologist as, Rayetta the Younger.

So even further anon, her anthropological semi-fame assured, Rayetta the Younger, presents a paper on the important subtopic “Rayetta the Younger’s Bog Hopper”at the AMofUNH. One of Rayetta’s power point slides and an excerpt from the text are foretold below.

Yes indeed, as you may be aware, many have speculated on the portent of the vent for long ages. And many also have ventured beyond mere speculation and opinion and have formulated hypotheses. Is the vent for sexual display, akin to the dimorphic plumage of the rooster? Is the vent for thermo-regulation, cooling the rete mirabile of the scrotum? Is the vent for egress from the undears, for excretory or even sexually related performances? Ha! As we now realize, and thanks entirely to me, Rayetta the Younger, the vent was a morale booster for the male bog hopper, his undears so designed to preclude the notion that he was wearing panties. Thus every undear constructed had its vent, and these were vended exclusively to the male bog hoppers, for none of the ladies have ever been discovered, ensconced with vented panties.

Now let us examine some of the additional artifacts and bog hopper remains. We see here depicted on the power point slide somewhere, the famous bog hopper nose with upper lip attached, the even more famous undears with vent indicated, and the bog hopper’s pipe.

Crumby the Younger, are you in attendance?

Yepper, I am ever present, Rayetta, and always at yer service.

Crumby, what the heck did you say that pipe was appelated?

Ah yes. That particular pipe was constructed from the underground tuberous rhizome of a common briar of those ancient times in those parts.

Yes, I can see that Crumby, but what was the scientific name of that particular briar.

Ah yes Rayetta. The scientific name of that briar was, and is, (Smilax boner-knocks).
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And thus we espy yet once more, that we, or some of us anyway, inhabit a planet that ellipses round about, again and again.

The Arkdruid