Crumby - Water Ecology for Dummies, Er, I Mean Rocket Scientists

Sadly, a great many that pass themselves off as scientists also find no contradiction between the science they may practice in their daily lives and such creative opinions as creative design, or perhaps the slightly less advanced opinion, The Lord shall provide. Yessir, many of our engineers and scientists, even some rocket scientists, may need some help from time to time, sorting their opinions from their facts. But no help shall be forthcoming from the Druids. For that lot, those mixed-up rocket scientists, the Druids offer only satire.

Let us see. We have the former Colorado River all dammed up these days. Behind the dams we have lakes. Presumably, lakes work by holding water. The rocket scientists in charge of the lakes make down grade decisions regarding the lake water. Upgrade decisions on refilling the lakes are left up to, the Lord. Yepper, the Lord giveth and the rocket scientists taketh away.

Now that we have a basic understanding on how lakes work, consider the Lord’s role of providing the input. The Lord could, theoretically, if he so chose, direct a bunch of clouds to sit over the lakes and rain directly on the lakes, thus filling the lakes up, balancing the rocket scientists’ deductions. But for reasons known only to the Lord, he does not work in that mysterious way. Instead, the Lord tests the rocket scientists regularly to see if they have faith in him. The rocket scientists call these testing events, droughts.

The rocket scientists, however, always have plenty of faith, and plenty of water in the lakes too. Plus the rocket scientists always have a numerical quantity expressing how much water is still available for down grade. This numerical quantity is generally expressed as the Druid equivalent “a tousand, maybe two tousand acre feet.”* “Fret not water consuming public, we have a tousand or maybe two tousand acre feet in the lakes. That’s plenty of water for a great multitude, if this other great multitude over here conserves their tousand or so acre feet.”

The Lord, meantime, is temporarily making his job harder by refusing to place rain clouds directly over the lakes. The Lord is also making his job harder, temporarily heating up the lakes so that the water evaporates faster. Then too, the Lord is, considerably assisted by the rocket scientists, temporarily preventing runoff from entering the lakes. Er. Perhaps, this last Lordly task requires elucidation. The Lord prevents rain water from entering the lakes in many mysterious ways. The rocket scientists help the Lord out with this task by interdicting the down grade flow, so that nasty, germy water does not get in the lakes.

All righty then. To sum up, the Lord is temporarily refusing to put rain clouds directly over the lakes. The Lord is also temporarily evaporating more water from the lakes. And the Lord is willfully allowing some rain water for mysterious purposes. Yet, the rocket scientists have a tousand or maybe two tousand acre feet of water in reserve. That’s plenty for the time being. Plus the Lord shall provide, more.

Here at the CB, the ground is cracked and the little ones thirst. All the little seedlings cry out, “We’re thirsty, please give us some water.” Mercy! If these little seedlings die of thirst, shall the Lord, then temporarily, make it even hotter and drier in these parts. Goodness! We must ask the rocket scientists what the Lord, knows.
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* When Druids don't know a precise number, Druids use the phrase, maybe one tousand, maybe two tousand, to indicate an imprecise numerical quantity.

The Ark Druid