Ray's Thought for the Day - Venting

All righty then. Since we CB Druids have been fairly good girls and boys for a fairly long interval of what passes for time, the Ark Druid has decided to let up on the censorship, to see how that works for a nonce or twain. So here's my bosom companion Crumby, shorn of his better sense, all riled up.

Crumby Vents

Dang it! Hold it! I was fixing to get aggravated on account of the Mammonites are fixing to have the opinion that one of my old gravy trains, the black-capped vireo (Vireo atricapilla) (BCV), or however those responsible party knuckleheads spell the scientific name these days, is merely threatened, not endangered. But then I thought, OK, I can live with threatened since we are dealing with the virtual versus the real, anyway.

What set me off on this was a Robert somebody or other who wrote in one of those stupid letters to the editor in our doofus newspaper. Jeez Louise! It is certainly a character failing that I still ever bother to read that crap, ever. No doubt, my wicked, plus ignorant Christian past, influences me to read that ignorant and vulgar, plus dopey newspaper.

Anyway, Robert what’s his name wrote in this letter to the dopey paper that I happened to read. The gist of Robert’s opinions stated in his letter is that the US FWS never had a clue as to how many BCVs were habitating anywhere except maybe the Kerr Wildlife Management Area and similar well known parts. All that is true. So the FWS listed the BCV as endangered, only speculating on how many BCVs were extant.

Then, surprise, surprise, as a direct result of the listing process, a tiny number of people, most of whom I know personally, plus me, found lots more BCVs. How easy was that? Really easy, for the slightly observant. Ha! We all got paid with money that would never have been forthcoming except for the ESA. So now there are way more BCVs than was originally thought, documented. My goodness, there are several thousand. Good Goddess, there are almost half as many or 25% maybe BCVs, total, as there are Mammonites habitating in Bee Caves.

Then also Robert what’s his name really pissed me off, whining about the poor, forlorn, small ranchers whose lives were ruined by the listing of the BCV as endangered. What a crock of shit, that is? Jeez Louise! That is sooooooooooo shit worthy. There has been no, that is no, enforcement of the ESA on private property in the Republic of Tejas for so long that I can not ever remember the last time the ESA got enforced relative to the BCV. In fact, such an action may have never happened, ever. What a crock?

Well, all righty then, maybe some dimwit landowner bragged that he had been shooting and then eating BCVs for years and somebody reported that idiot.

Yep. I eat them vermin. Otherwise, the guvment might seize my storage area. Best to eat ‘em up, so they won’t be no evidence.

This is of course, total bullshit braggadocio. No land owner in these parts can identify much of any biological elements on their properties by themselves, much less a tiny dickey bird.

Yet our dimwit landowner may have brought himself to the attention of the virtual enforcement division of US FWS.

Mercy! Sir, you must stop bragging about eating those BCVs. Mercy! Eating those BCVs is against the law. You may get in trouble if a Democrat ever gets elected again, maybe. So watch out!

Robert what’s his name did have one opinion that is right on though. The developers have had no trouble with the ESA in these parts. In fact, the developers have had lots of help coping with the virtual aspects of the ESA. In fact, it is as if the ESA was penned, just for them.

Holy Smokes! I seldom allow myself to get this riled up about virtual bullshit anymore. Aloha pendechos! And remember, some of your tax money is now in my checking account. Plus, I used some of your tax money to pursue my hobbies. Plus, without your tax money I would have never had the leisure time to study up on how to become a Druid. Suckers!!!!