Oogabooga Macarena

Troubled times have afflicted the ignorant savages of the ROT. That’s right. Those ignorant fucking savages failed to anticipate the law of demand and supply. The fact is, so many Tejanos are demanding pistolo ammo, the supply has failed to keep up. Good Goddess! Does this mean that the Mejicano drug lords that may rule the border region of the Republic shall run out of bullets? Maybe, maybe not.

OK. For every little problem there may be at least one solution. For example, the Druids anticipated the ammo shortage and stored up plenty of ammo back when ammo was relatively cheap. That’s right. Many may remember when Arab terrorists were purportedly fixing to get jobs driving buses for the Austin Independent School District (AISD). Well, that’s when, anticipating panic in the free gun and ammo market, we Druids went out and bought up mass quantities of ammo. All that ammo is now stored in cool dry spots, awaiting use someday, maybe.

But lots of ignorant savages figured Arab terrorists driving AISD school buses was a long shot and would probably not afflict ammo sales. That’s why they are ignorant savages. Yes. They are ignorant savages with no ammo at this very nonce. Yes. They are ignorant savages who have probably shot up all their bullets already and now have, no bullets. Yet the Druids feel pity for those ignorant savages. So Mary the Virgin and Karl the Tracker Druid came up with a spell that is guaranteed to bring ammo to the shelves of your Academy Surplus, maybe.

Here’s what you ignorant savages may do. Head on down to your favorite Academy Surplus. Stroll on over to the ammo aisle. Try to appear calm and nonchalant. Then, once you have inspected the empty shelves in a calm and nonchalant fashion, sing the Macarena song. That’s right. Everyone remembers the Macarena song! Who could forget the Macarena song?

That’s it. All you have to do is sing the Macarena song and dance round a bit, grooving to the tune. But of course, most of you ignorant savages don’t know any of the actual words to the Macarena song. So instead of employing the actual words, employ Oogabooga instead. See. Karl and Mary made a, Me want ammo!, spell, really easy to remember.

OK. According to Mary and Karl, the ammo may not appear on the shelves immediately. You may have to come back later, like a week later. Then, about a week later, those same empty shelves should be filled with a plentitude of the finest bullets or ammo of every caliber one’s heart could ever desire, ever. Praise the Goddess!