The Great Heat Versus the White People

Leaving aside the idiotic babbling of Mrs Palin, most of the craziness exhibited by white people in North America, lately, comes from the most heat stressed parts. Among those heat stressed parts are Nevada and South Carolina. Course Oklahoma, plus the Confederacy, are always on the verge of civic meltdown, exacerbated by the heat of summer. Yes. The summers are getting lots hotter and the likelihood of general civil disorder plus bad manners increases as the temperature rises. And don’t forget about Arizona. No, don’t forget, Arizona is getting hotter and nuttier too.

Historically, white people were barely able to hang on in the south during the summer. But the general availability of free labor, and later, cheap labor, allowed white people to stay inside during the hottest days. There the white people would sit, inside, or maybe on the porch, as inert as possible, while the free or cheap labor fanned them and fetched lemonade.

Air conditioning changed all that. With the coming of air conditioning, the normal energy level of white people could be maintained inside the house even on the hottest days of summer. Yes. Even during the dog days, an average white person could move around a little inside the house, restlessly thinking up mischief. Naturally, the mischievous thoughts of the air-conditioned white people turned to masturbation, fornication, adultery, and sometimes, egad, sodomy! Mercy! Not only did air-conditioned white people consider sodomy a potential mischievous summer time entertainment, the most creative among the white people thought, Hmm, I bet I could also practice same sex sodomy.

Well, praise the Goddess, no one has figured out how to air condition the outdoors. Which means that the antics of white people are generally indoors during the summer. Yes. Indoors instead of out in front of the Goddess and everybody. Except for when it comes time to fess up. That’s when we all get to see the shit on TV.

So that pretty much concludes the positive impacts air conditioning has made on the behavior of white people. What I, Crumby, am personally most worried about is that the Palin family, freed from any civic responsibility in Alaska, shall move somewhere down south. Egad! Consider that bunch immigrating to the Republic of Tejas. Immediately, they would set up in a habitation with plenty of air conditioning. Then what would they get up to? Oh, my! And of course, the Palins, in a million years, would never think to bring their own water. Merci beaucoup!