Crumby Ovate on Vent Operation

Lomo, let’s watch Crumby on TV. The Druid Channel is broadcasting Crumby’s lecture. I have heard it through the grapevine that our junior ovate will be discussing Vent Operation. Also the station is employin' a new translator mechanism that will automatically translate Druidese into standard English. It will be interesting to see how that works.

Okie Dokie Rayetta. Me Lomo help with translater. Me Lomo make sure it work right for station Druids.

You did? Hmmmm. Well, crank it up Lomo, so I can hear it. I am surpassingly interested in this subtopic as well as the efficaciousness of the translater.

Okie Dokie, Lomo crank it up.

Yikes. Not that much.

Okie Dokie.
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Today, the Druid Remote Access Channel is visiting the grounds of the Druid Tabby Lab (DTL), where Badgemagus Swineherd, Ph D. is more or less in charge. Dr. Swineherd is, in addition to performing important administrative duties at this bucolic private Druid college , the Penultimate Authority (PA) for a great many of the Druids in These Parts (DTP). Today’s lecture touches upon the Adult Druid Male Mysteries (ADMM), so let’s join Dr. Swineherd, in full progress.

All righty then. Cease all that faunching around and listen up. I, Badgemagus Swineherd, PH. D, the PA for the bulk of the DTP, am pleased to inform both the esteemed male component of the faculty and the presumptively esteemed male sexed Tabby Labbers of the DTL that for the nonce we have a guest lecturer. He comes to us from Red’s Good Vs. Evil Cow Barn (RGVECB) where that thrice highly esteemed Ovate, my old pal, Mr. Red Ears, is well known to be the proprietor.
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Psst. Lomo! I don’t think the translater mechanism is workin’ 100%.

Translater doin’ Okie Dokie, Rayetta. I, Lomo followin’ along, mitey fine, all righty.

Jeez Louise!
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Red has had the onerous task, in addition to his foretelling responsibilities, of training post graduate Tabby Labbers for lo, many moons. As you well know, one of these, now mighty indeed among the DTP, is the famous Rayetta Pistrum known far and wide as the Lovely Druidess Rayetta (LDR), and then there is also the LDR’s brother, Ray, who just managed to matriculate with the benefit of a few doubts.
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Hmmm. The translater seems to be perking up, efficaciously.
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But many thought Red had finally lost his mind when he took on a heathen with no formal training and that same heathen scarcely dry behind the ears from a Christian baptism. Yes, I see from your shocked expressions that not all of you were aware of this startling divergence from our long tradition. But Red, a mule for stubborn, espied from afar some tiny glimmer of hope, that no other could espy, and thereupon ensconced this heathen at the CB, and undertook his training. The task Red undertook was, as you may surmise, long and arduous. For a heathen out of the wild is just that, a wild heathen, afflicted with lying and gluttony, espousing ignorance and vulgarity with every spell and deed. But Red is a mule for stubborn and a bear for work and at the long last, only a few years after anyone else would have given up in misery and utter despair, indeed in the neighborhood of 23 of the semi-great sweeps around Ogma, the boy showed he was ready, and now Red has, at the long last, trained up an official Assistant Ovate (AO).
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Psst! Lomo, it’s acting up again. Bang on it or something!

Rayetta be quiet. It workin’ fine.

Lomo, you idiot. Hardly anyone knows what “semi-great sweeps around Ogma” are!

Lomo know.

Jeez Louise!
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So here at our replica of the Sacred Grove, within the Very Parlor of the Great Goddess, arrives the Crumby Ovate. A Welcome Before You, Crumby Ovate.
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Many animal noises ensue and the four winds whip up the branches on the trees of the Sacred Grove and wonderful aromas waft about the Parlor.
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CLICKETY - BUZZZZZZ - CLICK!
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Lomo! It’s totally fritzed out! Fix it!
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Lomo not fix it. It not broke. Rayetta calm down.
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IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMINK!!!!!!!!!

Remote access to the Druid lecture at the DTL is now terminated for two reasons.

1) The lecture touches upon the ADMM.
2) No security measures for remote access that we have yet devised could assure that women or children might not take a peak at this important male only lecture that touches upon our very important male only Druid rituals.

The Arkdruid
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Mcps!

What did ye spell Rayetta?

Nothing Arkdruid.