Ray's Thought for the Day -Ray and Olwen Part 2-1
The key components of Ray’s dismissed retinue, the triplets, Chitlin, Rumpler and Sleeza all had done business within Upyeraholes’ Castle of Justice, so they all had contacts within the Halls of Justice they could contact, and these contacts helped the triplets do business, or recreate, or have lunch, or shop, or whatever, when they visited the Castle of Justice. So when Ray cut them loose they headed for one of their favorite hangouts, the Pro Club at the golf course where they all had contacts plus their own lockers and the facilities also contained showers where they might wash off the slobber that had recently slobbered onto their persons. Chiltin, Rumpler and Sleeza were unhappy about the slobber because that much slobber actually getting on them was unprecedented. “The Kinglet shall be leaked information regarding my suffering on this quest due to the slobber and how hard I have had to work to keep track of that juvenile delinquent, Ray,” Rumpler threatened. “Well! I may leak some information to the Kinglet myself. Whoever heard of a secretary sent out on a quest only to be slobbered over? It’s disgusting!” partially agreed Sleeza, supporting Rumpler tactically, but not necessarily strategically. But Chitlin only whistled, “bob-white, bob-white, bob-white,” as he strode, or perhaps waddled, the labyrinth hallways.
Anon, the triplets and associated minions arrived in the vicinity of the shops that vended everything under the sun or moon. Chitlin and Rumpler and Sleeza were then kept very busy for a time as they ordered this or that minion into this or that shop to fetch this or that artifact or phenomena that might serve their several needs on the way to the Pro Shop, and that they could perhaps utilize after they arrived at the Pro Shop, and eventually expense as theoretical tax write offs, but actually the artifacts and phenomena were more like net profits. Surprisingly, not Chitlin, not Rumpler and not even Sleeza delegated a minion into the shop vending “The Herbaceous Legumes of Kansas”, which pamphlet Ray, you may recall, had so coveted while on his trip to the Crown Vic to get his sack lunch sack and also his inspirational knob.
But you will be comforted to know that Ray, the juvenile delinquent, did lift a copy of the pamphlet “The Herbaceous Legumes of Kansas” after he enjoyed sexual intercourse with Olwen on the elevator, but before he enjoyed sexual intercourse with Olwen in the back seat of the Crown Vic. Olwen checked out the pamphlet on the way to the tourist court. By way of critique, Olwen told Ray “It’s pretty good, honey lamb, but probably not all inclusive.”
On strode the significant triplets of Ray’s dismissed retinue and by the time they reached the environs of the Pro Club, the minions trailing in their wake were much encumbered with this or that artifact or phenomena. But soon the minions were unencumbered as they stowed all the loot into one or another of the triplets’ lockers. The minions wanted to get cleaned up too, but they couldn’t because they were all on duty and they were minions. And minions just have to put up with the slobber and splattered brains and other stuff that may stick on them in these situations. However, Chitlin and Rumpler and especially Sleeza showered off and tidied themselves up. After they got showered off and tidied up, Chitlin and Rumpler and Sleeza, all went to have a nice meal at the Pro Club Restaurant. Anon, (Chiltin enjoyed three fifties of hunt-able quail. Rumpler wore brand new stripedy underwear on his old noggin as he dined, for none in those parts dared enforce the no hats at supper rule on one so mighty as Rumpler. Sleeza had something fishy.) after a delicious meal, all of the triplet felt lots better. But even so, some twain of the triplet, Rumpler and Ssleeza, began to argue about what still potentially pertained of the responsibility the Kinglet had delegated to them, to whit, to help Ray.
Chitlin, on the other hand, you may recall, was a seriously unwilling participant on the quest. Chitlin disliked taking orders from inferiors like the Kinglet. Moreover, Chitlin would have never been found ever, at one of his undisclosed locations, and he would never have participated on the quest ever, except as Ray suspected, Chiltin thought he might sneak around Olwen and get a peek or two. But that was the only reason Chitlin was on the quest. So Chitlin had no comment.
But Rumpler and Sleeza made up for Chitlin. Rumpler thought that they should play a round of golf, then go find a tourist court to spend the night. But Sleeza wanted to play tennis and then go to a nice tourist court. So the great debate raged for a while, but finally they decided that Rumpler would go play golf and Sleeza would go play tennis and Chitlin decided he’d go to an undisclosed location, but they would all meet up later on the lawn where the air conditioned limousines were parked and then go find a nice tourist court where they might comfortably spend the night. After all, in the unlikely event that Ray escaped the Big Hand the Law, and the Long Arm of the Law and Upyeraholes, well, didn’t do you know what to Ray, then they could always find Ray, or the Crown Vic anyway, with Rumpler’s tracking device. So the triplets all went their separate ways and they felt swell after their meeting, frank discussion and consensus on tactics and strategy. And all that they predicted would happen, in terms of their personal recreational activities and personal lodgings for that night, did happen. So it is an exaggeration to claim, as some do, that the triplets were wrong about everything.
But then, because the Crown Vic remained inert for a couple of days maybe, while Ray was engaged in winning Olwen so he might enjoy sexual intercourse with Olwen, the triplets discovered they had plenty of time for networking with their contacts and even for some recreational activities. Rumpler and Sleeza though, also dutifully leaked information to the Kinglet. “Ray was greeted with flowers and kisses by Upyeraholes.” “Upyeraholes was so glad to see Ray, he gave Ray a bath.” “Ray is within a lalahair of having sexual intercourse.” “Ray will have sexual intercourse, anon.” “Ray is about to have sexual intercourse, any minute.” Ray is determined to have sexual intercourse, eventually.” "We have a secret plan that will assure Ray gets to have sexual intercourse fairly soon.”
Chitlin, however sent but one terse line to his inferior, the Kinglet. “I am working secretly at an undisclosed location.” But even as Chitlin penned this terse note Chitlin surmised, “I should shoot Ray and shoot Upyeraholes and then I could have all Upyeraholes stuff, and all Ray’s stuff, and, slurp, Olwen White Track as well.
The Kinglet leaked back to the triplets. “Do you need Rover? If you want, I can send Rover over”.
Sleeza and Rumpler leaked back. “No Kinglet. You keep Rover. You need Rover.”
But Chitlin didn’t leak back. So the Kinglet assumed Chitlin didn’t need Rover, either. So Rover didn’t get to go.
Anon, the triplets and associated minions arrived in the vicinity of the shops that vended everything under the sun or moon. Chitlin and Rumpler and Sleeza were then kept very busy for a time as they ordered this or that minion into this or that shop to fetch this or that artifact or phenomena that might serve their several needs on the way to the Pro Shop, and that they could perhaps utilize after they arrived at the Pro Shop, and eventually expense as theoretical tax write offs, but actually the artifacts and phenomena were more like net profits. Surprisingly, not Chitlin, not Rumpler and not even Sleeza delegated a minion into the shop vending “The Herbaceous Legumes of Kansas”, which pamphlet Ray, you may recall, had so coveted while on his trip to the Crown Vic to get his sack lunch sack and also his inspirational knob.
But you will be comforted to know that Ray, the juvenile delinquent, did lift a copy of the pamphlet “The Herbaceous Legumes of Kansas” after he enjoyed sexual intercourse with Olwen on the elevator, but before he enjoyed sexual intercourse with Olwen in the back seat of the Crown Vic. Olwen checked out the pamphlet on the way to the tourist court. By way of critique, Olwen told Ray “It’s pretty good, honey lamb, but probably not all inclusive.”
On strode the significant triplets of Ray’s dismissed retinue and by the time they reached the environs of the Pro Club, the minions trailing in their wake were much encumbered with this or that artifact or phenomena. But soon the minions were unencumbered as they stowed all the loot into one or another of the triplets’ lockers. The minions wanted to get cleaned up too, but they couldn’t because they were all on duty and they were minions. And minions just have to put up with the slobber and splattered brains and other stuff that may stick on them in these situations. However, Chitlin and Rumpler and especially Sleeza showered off and tidied themselves up. After they got showered off and tidied up, Chitlin and Rumpler and Sleeza, all went to have a nice meal at the Pro Club Restaurant. Anon, (Chiltin enjoyed three fifties of hunt-able quail. Rumpler wore brand new stripedy underwear on his old noggin as he dined, for none in those parts dared enforce the no hats at supper rule on one so mighty as Rumpler. Sleeza had something fishy.) after a delicious meal, all of the triplet felt lots better. But even so, some twain of the triplet, Rumpler and Ssleeza, began to argue about what still potentially pertained of the responsibility the Kinglet had delegated to them, to whit, to help Ray.
Chitlin, on the other hand, you may recall, was a seriously unwilling participant on the quest. Chitlin disliked taking orders from inferiors like the Kinglet. Moreover, Chitlin would have never been found ever, at one of his undisclosed locations, and he would never have participated on the quest ever, except as Ray suspected, Chiltin thought he might sneak around Olwen and get a peek or two. But that was the only reason Chitlin was on the quest. So Chitlin had no comment.
But Rumpler and Sleeza made up for Chitlin. Rumpler thought that they should play a round of golf, then go find a tourist court to spend the night. But Sleeza wanted to play tennis and then go to a nice tourist court. So the great debate raged for a while, but finally they decided that Rumpler would go play golf and Sleeza would go play tennis and Chitlin decided he’d go to an undisclosed location, but they would all meet up later on the lawn where the air conditioned limousines were parked and then go find a nice tourist court where they might comfortably spend the night. After all, in the unlikely event that Ray escaped the Big Hand the Law, and the Long Arm of the Law and Upyeraholes, well, didn’t do you know what to Ray, then they could always find Ray, or the Crown Vic anyway, with Rumpler’s tracking device. So the triplets all went their separate ways and they felt swell after their meeting, frank discussion and consensus on tactics and strategy. And all that they predicted would happen, in terms of their personal recreational activities and personal lodgings for that night, did happen. So it is an exaggeration to claim, as some do, that the triplets were wrong about everything.
But then, because the Crown Vic remained inert for a couple of days maybe, while Ray was engaged in winning Olwen so he might enjoy sexual intercourse with Olwen, the triplets discovered they had plenty of time for networking with their contacts and even for some recreational activities. Rumpler and Sleeza though, also dutifully leaked information to the Kinglet. “Ray was greeted with flowers and kisses by Upyeraholes.” “Upyeraholes was so glad to see Ray, he gave Ray a bath.” “Ray is within a lalahair of having sexual intercourse.” “Ray will have sexual intercourse, anon.” “Ray is about to have sexual intercourse, any minute.” Ray is determined to have sexual intercourse, eventually.” "We have a secret plan that will assure Ray gets to have sexual intercourse fairly soon.”
Chitlin, however sent but one terse line to his inferior, the Kinglet. “I am working secretly at an undisclosed location.” But even as Chitlin penned this terse note Chitlin surmised, “I should shoot Ray and shoot Upyeraholes and then I could have all Upyeraholes stuff, and all Ray’s stuff, and, slurp, Olwen White Track as well.
The Kinglet leaked back to the triplets. “Do you need Rover? If you want, I can send Rover over”.
Sleeza and Rumpler leaked back. “No Kinglet. You keep Rover. You need Rover.”
But Chitlin didn’t leak back. So the Kinglet assumed Chitlin didn’t need Rover, either. So Rover didn’t get to go.
posted by ray pistrum at Wednesday, April 12, 2006
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