Crumby Mulls Over The Fear Factor

What are the worst things you can imagine that are really scary? Easy that, things that can get you. Even in the safe Homeland you are not entirely safe from all those things you can imagine that could potentially get you. Probably, if you have a lick of sense, you are most afraid of a criminal getting you and doing things to you against your will or afflicting your property. It’s easy to find examples of what those things might be, isn’t it?

Then there are worst things other than being got by a criminal. What are some of those things? Easy that, serpents, scorpions, spiders and other similar wild animals might get you. But there’s not much chance of that, statistically considered, or compared with the chance a criminal will get you.

You may be able to imagine yourself with a terrible disease. But that’s not likely until you are diagnosed, or someone you know pretty well is diagnosed. Then you have to imagine about insurance.

If you have a dangerous job, you can probably imagine what could happen to you if the rig or the coal mine blew up or a criminal attacked your convenience store. Then also, you can probably imagine that you could lose your job, followed by imagining lots of stuff that happens to people who don’t have any money.

You may imagine a motor vehicle accident getting you. But more likely, you imagine a motor vehicle accident getting someone else, probably a family member. Then there’s always airplane crashes to imagine.

Finally, I guess a great many can imagine a terrorist foreigner getting them here in the Homeland since we have one example of that.

But what if you were the Kinglet or Chitlin. If you were them, hardly any of the above scary things that you can easily imagine happening to you, could happen to them. Oh, they could get a fatal disease, maybe. But if they did, they’d get the best treatment money can buy and lots of sympathy. Plus they’d have insurance. The rest of the really scary stuff you can imagine, probably does not apply to the Kinglet and Chitlin. They have plenty of security for themselves and their families and the best airplane pilots and chauffeurs to ferry them about. And Chitlin has lots of secret locations to hide out in.

So what might spook the Kinglet or Chitlin? Easy that, loss of their way of life. What they have, and you don’t, is a way of life that frees them from all those scary imaginings you have. No wonder they are fiercely protective of their way of life. So protective that they make sure all the Homeland is aware of the need to protect their way of life.

You may see, however, that the Kinglet and Chitlin do imagine worst things getting them too. Just not the same ones you imagine. But wait! The Kinglet and Chitlin are the two most powerful duo on Earth. What could they possibly imagine that would spook them? Easy that, they imagine people who want to mess with their way of life.

Who are those people that spook the Kinglet and Chitlin? Easy that, anyone they consider a threat to their way of life. Since that list is a long one and includes some real fears and imagined fears that may be real, or not, or entirely fabricated fears, let’s consider the shorter list of those kindly, harmless people the Kinglet and Chitlin do not fear in order of decreasing importance to the maintenance of their way of life.

1) Defenseless third world laborers
2) Homeland Mammonites
3) Muslim royalty and Muslim puppets
4) Tony Blair

Other than these three groups, and Tony, everyone else is a fearful prospect for the Kinglet and Chitlin, filling them full of trepidation for the survival of their way of life. But whom, among everyone else, are the Kinglet and Chitlin most afraid will screw with their way of life? Not easy that! It’s not Saddam/Osama, or Kim, or the What’s It of Iran, apparently. Maybe it’s Nancy Pelosi or Mrs. Clinton. Do you think?