Republicans Stall Evolution Since Hoover

How come I didn’t get to see the fireball streak across the Sunday morning sky? How come I didn’t get to see falling, fiery debris? Well. I got up as usual, looked out, the skies were cloudy. That was that. Yet apparently, some lucky citizens of these parts were lucky enough to espy the falling fiery debris in spite of cloudy skies. Hold it! Seems like most of the reports of falling, fiery debris come from Williamson County, located to my north. That explains a lot. Those sightings were probably faith based sightings.

Hold it! I’m fixing to call Karl the Tracker Druid. Karl! This is Crumby. Did you go check up on the falling fiery debris in Williamson County? You did! What was it? A Mercury Comet! Bullshit Karl! You expect me to believe the falling fiery debris was a Mercury Comet? A black 66, 6 cylinder, three on the column with green plastic interior! Heh! Fuck you Karl!

Sorry about that. Karl has a weird since of humor when it comes to unsolicited phone calls on his business line. Yet before I got distracted by the falling, fiery debris observed by many of the most trustworthy observers of such phenomena inhabiting Williamson County, I was fixing to congratulate the Republicans for stalling evolution since Hoover.

Correct. Darwin is now over 200 years old. His theory has been operating almost everywhere all that time explaining evolution. Yet in parts of North America controlled by Republicans, Darwin has had no effect since Hoover. That means evolution has stood still in those parts since Hoover.

Good Goddess All Mighty!