Summer Solstice Night
What do tonight and Blanco County have in common? Easy money. They are both short. That is, when traveling through Blanco County, along Hwy. 71, an average person may assume that the trip through Blanco County is a mighty short trip. So if an average person makes that trip on Summer Solstice Night, speeding through Blanco County concealed in the stygian darkness on a moonless night fit only for witches, like that could result in a time warp, maybe.
Good Goddess! I never thought of that before. I bet many a sad ass resident of Blanco County has headed out on Summer Solstice Night, hunting Blancos, only to never be seen again. Huh-huh. I mean, mercy!
Put all that aside and out of your noggin, Crumby. And fear not, Goddess Willing you shall pass the bounds of the Blancos while fickle Ogma still sails the sky, beaming down, burning up all the vegetation. On you shall venture, Crumby, though that journey shall be long, arduous and only made bearable by air conditioning. On you shall fare, westerly, racing fickle Ogma toward that westerly horizon.
OK. The hurly burly here is Coma Berenices (I finally figured out it’s her short hairs) , Ursa Major and Virgo are still up tonight and fairly high at 10:30 PM. Then also, Andromeda and Pisces are both up and fairly high by 4AM tomorrow morning. Which means that I could espy all the missing Messier galaxies tonight.
To review, the missing Messier galaxies are: M88, M91, M98, M100, M90, M108, M109, M110 and M74. These are the nine galaxies that have so far been cloaked in invisibility. Yes. So far these nine have looked just like the nine Nazgul with their clothes off. Huh-huh. Why didn’t the Nazgul take their clothes off in the movie? Easy money. They needed clothes, at least undears so they could comfortably ride on horses or Pterosaurs. The rest of the time, like when they were at home, they didn’t wear any clothes. They were probably lots scarier without clothes.
So, despite not getting to go anywhere near Stonehenge, I am fixing to maybe get to enjoy some naked heavenly bodies and have some fun anyway. Praise the Goddess!
Later
Maybe. Maybe, maybe, maybe. That’s right, maybe. With the temperature hovering near 100, I loaded up the great red tube and many accouterments, some astronomical, some personal, some both, into the great vehicle. By the time many of the items I needed were stowed, I was hot and sweaty. Yet a little great vehicle air conditioning fixed me right up. West I headed, as the stinky sweat slowly dried up on my T-shirt, leaving only a salty crust.
As I drove along, I praised the Goddess with song, poetry and prose. Yes, Thanks largely to the WG, I was fixing to get to have some fun. Plus the Goddess had kept the sweat bees off me while I was loading the great vehicle. Those sweat bees could have delayed me a lot. Also, I was spared cows fixing to lick salt off me. I thanked the WG for that, too.
Off I went. Up ahead, the ever fickle Ogma Sunface blazed down relentlessly. The situation seemed to be that Ogma, shedding his relentless heat, was trying to delay me, or even turn me back. Turn back Crumby. It’s too hot for man or beast. Turn back. But inside the air conditioned great vehicle Ogma’s rays produced little effect on Crumby. Crumby drove along, happily reflecting upon all the naked celestial splendors he was fixing to get to observe in all their glory. On Crumby drove, on and on. Alas, I must pass through this shit hole, Bee Cave, before I can get anywhere, Crumby reflected.
On drove Crumby, on and on. At last with Bee Cave far gone, Crumby began to make better progress. Better, better progress, than no progress, thought Crumby.
Anon, Crumby arrived at his destination. Hey! That gate is chained and locked. Oh no! Crumby had no combination for the lock. Crumby’s site documentation had no combination information. Crumby’s cell phone was out of its service area. Crumby tried and tried, but he could not guess the combination. Crumby could not espy anyway to drive around the gate. Crumby lacked bolt cutters.
Golless dang it! OK. I shall just set up right here at this gate. Uckfa ema ackedna, astardsba!
The obligatory tantrum out of the way, Crumby knew he had to collimate the great red tube in a hurry before fickle Ogma faded. Crumby unloaded all the gear. Crumby collimated the great red tube, which amazingly, despite the ride, was spot on.
Ha! I am all set, Crumby figured, as Ogma sank slowly in the west. I’ll just rig up an eyepiece or two and............................ Oh no.
Mercy. Crumby forgot his eps. Crumby did not have even one ep. Not even one. No Messier glaxies tonight. Not even one. There was nothing left to do but load up all the gear and head back out. Yes. Head back, all sweaty again from the exertion of unloading and loading up all the gear. Once more the ac dried the sweat on Crumby’s salt-rimed T-shirt. Mercy!
So. This one was the worst Summer Solstice Crumby can recall on a personal level. However, the summer solstices are, on the climatic level, fixing to get way worse for these parts, even than this one, from here on out. Way worse.
Yes. The White Goddess is seeking retribution on evil doers that dwell in these parts. Once those evil doers have made the place plenty hot, and used up all the water, the WG shall make sure they all rot in Hell. To avoid this certain fate, the young and hopeful should move along. My Druid Ovate advice is, move to Deeeeeeee-troit. There's plenty of water in Deeeeeeee-troit.
Good Goddess! I never thought of that before. I bet many a sad ass resident of Blanco County has headed out on Summer Solstice Night, hunting Blancos, only to never be seen again. Huh-huh. I mean, mercy!
Put all that aside and out of your noggin, Crumby. And fear not, Goddess Willing you shall pass the bounds of the Blancos while fickle Ogma still sails the sky, beaming down, burning up all the vegetation. On you shall venture, Crumby, though that journey shall be long, arduous and only made bearable by air conditioning. On you shall fare, westerly, racing fickle Ogma toward that westerly horizon.
OK. The hurly burly here is Coma Berenices (I finally figured out it’s her short hairs) , Ursa Major and Virgo are still up tonight and fairly high at 10:30 PM. Then also, Andromeda and Pisces are both up and fairly high by 4AM tomorrow morning. Which means that I could espy all the missing Messier galaxies tonight.
To review, the missing Messier galaxies are: M88, M91, M98, M100, M90, M108, M109, M110 and M74. These are the nine galaxies that have so far been cloaked in invisibility. Yes. So far these nine have looked just like the nine Nazgul with their clothes off. Huh-huh. Why didn’t the Nazgul take their clothes off in the movie? Easy money. They needed clothes, at least undears so they could comfortably ride on horses or Pterosaurs. The rest of the time, like when they were at home, they didn’t wear any clothes. They were probably lots scarier without clothes.
So, despite not getting to go anywhere near Stonehenge, I am fixing to maybe get to enjoy some naked heavenly bodies and have some fun anyway. Praise the Goddess!
Later
Maybe. Maybe, maybe, maybe. That’s right, maybe. With the temperature hovering near 100, I loaded up the great red tube and many accouterments, some astronomical, some personal, some both, into the great vehicle. By the time many of the items I needed were stowed, I was hot and sweaty. Yet a little great vehicle air conditioning fixed me right up. West I headed, as the stinky sweat slowly dried up on my T-shirt, leaving only a salty crust.
As I drove along, I praised the Goddess with song, poetry and prose. Yes, Thanks largely to the WG, I was fixing to get to have some fun. Plus the Goddess had kept the sweat bees off me while I was loading the great vehicle. Those sweat bees could have delayed me a lot. Also, I was spared cows fixing to lick salt off me. I thanked the WG for that, too.
Off I went. Up ahead, the ever fickle Ogma Sunface blazed down relentlessly. The situation seemed to be that Ogma, shedding his relentless heat, was trying to delay me, or even turn me back. Turn back Crumby. It’s too hot for man or beast. Turn back. But inside the air conditioned great vehicle Ogma’s rays produced little effect on Crumby. Crumby drove along, happily reflecting upon all the naked celestial splendors he was fixing to get to observe in all their glory. On Crumby drove, on and on. Alas, I must pass through this shit hole, Bee Cave, before I can get anywhere, Crumby reflected.
On drove Crumby, on and on. At last with Bee Cave far gone, Crumby began to make better progress. Better, better progress, than no progress, thought Crumby.
Anon, Crumby arrived at his destination. Hey! That gate is chained and locked. Oh no! Crumby had no combination for the lock. Crumby’s site documentation had no combination information. Crumby’s cell phone was out of its service area. Crumby tried and tried, but he could not guess the combination. Crumby could not espy anyway to drive around the gate. Crumby lacked bolt cutters.
Golless dang it! OK. I shall just set up right here at this gate. Uckfa ema ackedna, astardsba!
The obligatory tantrum out of the way, Crumby knew he had to collimate the great red tube in a hurry before fickle Ogma faded. Crumby unloaded all the gear. Crumby collimated the great red tube, which amazingly, despite the ride, was spot on.
Ha! I am all set, Crumby figured, as Ogma sank slowly in the west. I’ll just rig up an eyepiece or two and............................ Oh no.
Mercy. Crumby forgot his eps. Crumby did not have even one ep. Not even one. No Messier glaxies tonight. Not even one. There was nothing left to do but load up all the gear and head back out. Yes. Head back, all sweaty again from the exertion of unloading and loading up all the gear. Once more the ac dried the sweat on Crumby’s salt-rimed T-shirt. Mercy!
So. This one was the worst Summer Solstice Crumby can recall on a personal level. However, the summer solstices are, on the climatic level, fixing to get way worse for these parts, even than this one, from here on out. Way worse.
Yes. The White Goddess is seeking retribution on evil doers that dwell in these parts. Once those evil doers have made the place plenty hot, and used up all the water, the WG shall make sure they all rot in Hell. To avoid this certain fate, the young and hopeful should move along. My Druid Ovate advice is, move to Deeeeeeee-troit. There's plenty of water in Deeeeeeee-troit.
posted by ray pistrum at Monday, June 22, 2009
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