Red, rocks on
Vladamir ye,and Bill go polar bear the GEM. Fer Ogma is slinking off and I hanker fer the Eskimo Nebulung fer my nightly. All righty then. Y’all sabby. Well go on now. And watch out fer spiders. There’s a great many poisonous spiders out yonder.
Fer the nonce I must mostly labor as much as a score of mere mortals. Ray-mone. Go pull up some rescue grass. Ray-mone. Whar be ye? Whoa! Stop that appearin’ suddenly. Dang it! Did ye hear me, go pull up some rescue grass. Naw it aint that dark yet. Now ye go find some. And bring it to me to look at when ye get it. All righty then. Dern foreigners.
But lookee here then. It’s a dang letter, frum Ray.
____
Red,
I am having a real nice time on my adventure and I bet ye are too. The quest part was successful and I got to enjoy sexual intercourse. I’ll spell all about that when I come visit sometime, maybe. But listen up Red. This is important. Ye know that ol’ fart Upyeraholes? Right. Well, I cain’t figure out if he’s alive er dead and me and him got unfinished business, one way er t’other. But I need time to figure out if he's alive er dead by myself, cause if I don't figure it out by myself, I won't get to be a sun god, prob'ly. It shouldn’t take long fer em to dig em up. The whole dang guvment is fixin’ to dig em up at the locale where he was last espied. So once they got em dug up, I can waltz up to em to see if he’s alive er dead. And if he’s alive I got business with em. But if he’s dead I got other stuff to do. Right!. But Red, I need to do all this solo er I won’t be the dang hero. Right! So then there’s Olwen. And she’s been on me about her daddy, Upeyeraholes. And she got this idea frum somewhere that a Druid could hep her find her daddy, dead er alive. So now she wants me to use my Druid powers to find her daddy. But I forgot how to do a dang buzzard transmigration. Right. Yer following along here. Right! Dang! Gotta go.
Yer pal,
Ray
____
That dern Ray. Whut’s he up to?
Fer the nonce I must mostly labor as much as a score of mere mortals. Ray-mone. Go pull up some rescue grass. Ray-mone. Whar be ye? Whoa! Stop that appearin’ suddenly. Dang it! Did ye hear me, go pull up some rescue grass. Naw it aint that dark yet. Now ye go find some. And bring it to me to look at when ye get it. All righty then. Dern foreigners.
But lookee here then. It’s a dang letter, frum Ray.
____
Red,
I am having a real nice time on my adventure and I bet ye are too. The quest part was successful and I got to enjoy sexual intercourse. I’ll spell all about that when I come visit sometime, maybe. But listen up Red. This is important. Ye know that ol’ fart Upyeraholes? Right. Well, I cain’t figure out if he’s alive er dead and me and him got unfinished business, one way er t’other. But I need time to figure out if he's alive er dead by myself, cause if I don't figure it out by myself, I won't get to be a sun god, prob'ly. It shouldn’t take long fer em to dig em up. The whole dang guvment is fixin’ to dig em up at the locale where he was last espied. So once they got em dug up, I can waltz up to em to see if he’s alive er dead. And if he’s alive I got business with em. But if he’s dead I got other stuff to do. Right!. But Red, I need to do all this solo er I won’t be the dang hero. Right! So then there’s Olwen. And she’s been on me about her daddy, Upeyeraholes. And she got this idea frum somewhere that a Druid could hep her find her daddy, dead er alive. So now she wants me to use my Druid powers to find her daddy. But I forgot how to do a dang buzzard transmigration. Right. Yer following along here. Right! Dang! Gotta go.
Yer pal,
Ray
____
That dern Ray. Whut’s he up to?
posted by ray pistrum at Tuesday, April 25, 2006
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