Ray's Thought for the Day - Ray and Olwen Part 2-8
Ray liked the nightlife, literally and metaphorically. To Ray, the starry sky whirling about his noggin seemed analogous to a disco floor that Ray recalled vaguely from an alternative iteration, perhaps . “Yepper, this is too cool. I can see all the cool stuff from up here. Olwen darlin’, this is too cool. Say Olwen. I got this bosom companion, Crumby, that is the Crumby Ovate. Anyhow, Crumby is earthbound, generally, and must rely on telescopery to get around in these parts. Do ye think we could fetch Crumby along on one of yer nightly rounds, anon, maybe?”
No Ray. I’m sorry sugar. There’s only room fer twain at a time. But if ye should like to sleep in, some starry night, then perhaps Crumby would like to come along in yer stead.
Er. Would ye be wearin’ that see through negligee if Crumby was along?
Certainly sugar. This beautiful, sheer, see through negligee is my work outfit.
Er. Er. Yepper. This is too cool. I can see all the cool stuff from up here.
_____
But at the White House or White Palace or whatever, the Kinglet received an improtant phone call from Ray’s retinue.
Kinglet, is that you Kinglet? Who’s this? This is Secretary Sleeza and you better go get the Kinglet. Stop that simpering. Stop it. Now go get the Kinglet.
Who was that person simpering on the other end of the line, Sleeza?
That was the Kinglet’s theoretical and metaphorical First Lady, Chitlin. I sent her to go get the Kinglet. The Kinglet is in the comfort station.
Kinglet. O h Kinglet, dear. You have a phone call.
Heh, heh. Now I’ll just wipe this up. Heh-heh. Who’s it frum?
That rather dark-complections girl, Secretary Sleeza. She sounded very excited. So I forgive her how rude she was to me, because I know they are excitable by nature, and I have already asked Jesus to help Sleeza with how rude she is.
All righty then, my theoretical and metaphorical First Lady. That’s ornate. But I need to finish some business up in the comfort station so bring me the phone. It’s over on the desk, the one with the extra long cord. Here, I’ll crack the door so you can stick it in here.
Can I come in and talk on the phone too?
No.
Secretary Sleeza, is that you Secretary Sleeza? Chitlin and Rumpler is nearby too, you say? And ya’ll have a remainder report for me. Could you hold on a minute? Heh-heh. I got to wipe somethin’ up. There now. No, there’s some more. There now. Secretary Sleeza, What’s on your mind, Secretary Sleeza?
So Secretary Sleeza informed the Kinglet of all that had transpired that she needed to remind, or remained, the Kinglet about. But this took awhile because Chitlin and Rumpler kept trying to grab the phone away from Sleeza. Chiltlin and Rumpler both wanted to remained the Kinglet too.
But at last the Kinglet was made to remainder that Ray was riding around on a bus, the Castle of Justice needed to be cleaned up and that the full power and implemendacities of the government needed to be employed to clean the place up. And yes, the Kinglet needed to send Rover, over.
After all the remainders, Sleeza, to be polite, inquired of the Kinglet, Did you enjoy your helicopter ride, Kinglet?
Yep, I did, Secretary Sleeza. I always enjoy a good helicopter ride. Now I got some other business to attend to here so, bye. Click.
_____
Rover was getting to go. But first, before Rover got to go, Rover got to take a leak. So that’s what Rover did. Take a leak. Next day, bright and early, the Media Liberal, was all over the scene of the unprecedented disaster at the Castle of Justice. But the Media Liberal had to compete with the other aroma for attention. Nevertheless, the Media Liberal, was in the general vicinity of the Castle of Justice reporting that whatever had happened, maybe, was unprecedented. Moreover, someone needed to be held accountable for the tardy response to the unprecedented disaster that had apparently killed off thousands, or maybe millions, of minions and justice seekers, mostly lawyers. And what had become of Upyeraholes, Chief Justice? That was the question on everyone’s mind. But now, because Media Liberal was on the job, the place would get cleaned up and everyone would soon find out what had happened to Upyeraholes, Chief Justice, maybe.
No Ray. I’m sorry sugar. There’s only room fer twain at a time. But if ye should like to sleep in, some starry night, then perhaps Crumby would like to come along in yer stead.
Er. Would ye be wearin’ that see through negligee if Crumby was along?
Certainly sugar. This beautiful, sheer, see through negligee is my work outfit.
Er. Er. Yepper. This is too cool. I can see all the cool stuff from up here.
_____
But at the White House or White Palace or whatever, the Kinglet received an improtant phone call from Ray’s retinue.
Kinglet, is that you Kinglet? Who’s this? This is Secretary Sleeza and you better go get the Kinglet. Stop that simpering. Stop it. Now go get the Kinglet.
Who was that person simpering on the other end of the line, Sleeza?
That was the Kinglet’s theoretical and metaphorical First Lady, Chitlin. I sent her to go get the Kinglet. The Kinglet is in the comfort station.
Kinglet. O h Kinglet, dear. You have a phone call.
Heh, heh. Now I’ll just wipe this up. Heh-heh. Who’s it frum?
That rather dark-complections girl, Secretary Sleeza. She sounded very excited. So I forgive her how rude she was to me, because I know they are excitable by nature, and I have already asked Jesus to help Sleeza with how rude she is.
All righty then, my theoretical and metaphorical First Lady. That’s ornate. But I need to finish some business up in the comfort station so bring me the phone. It’s over on the desk, the one with the extra long cord. Here, I’ll crack the door so you can stick it in here.
Can I come in and talk on the phone too?
No.
Secretary Sleeza, is that you Secretary Sleeza? Chitlin and Rumpler is nearby too, you say? And ya’ll have a remainder report for me. Could you hold on a minute? Heh-heh. I got to wipe somethin’ up. There now. No, there’s some more. There now. Secretary Sleeza, What’s on your mind, Secretary Sleeza?
So Secretary Sleeza informed the Kinglet of all that had transpired that she needed to remind, or remained, the Kinglet about. But this took awhile because Chitlin and Rumpler kept trying to grab the phone away from Sleeza. Chiltlin and Rumpler both wanted to remained the Kinglet too.
But at last the Kinglet was made to remainder that Ray was riding around on a bus, the Castle of Justice needed to be cleaned up and that the full power and implemendacities of the government needed to be employed to clean the place up. And yes, the Kinglet needed to send Rover, over.
After all the remainders, Sleeza, to be polite, inquired of the Kinglet, Did you enjoy your helicopter ride, Kinglet?
Yep, I did, Secretary Sleeza. I always enjoy a good helicopter ride. Now I got some other business to attend to here so, bye. Click.
_____
Rover was getting to go. But first, before Rover got to go, Rover got to take a leak. So that’s what Rover did. Take a leak. Next day, bright and early, the Media Liberal, was all over the scene of the unprecedented disaster at the Castle of Justice. But the Media Liberal had to compete with the other aroma for attention. Nevertheless, the Media Liberal, was in the general vicinity of the Castle of Justice reporting that whatever had happened, maybe, was unprecedented. Moreover, someone needed to be held accountable for the tardy response to the unprecedented disaster that had apparently killed off thousands, or maybe millions, of minions and justice seekers, mostly lawyers. And what had become of Upyeraholes, Chief Justice? That was the question on everyone’s mind. But now, because Media Liberal was on the job, the place would get cleaned up and everyone would soon find out what had happened to Upyeraholes, Chief Justice, maybe.
posted by ray pistrum at Monday, April 17, 2006
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