Ray's Thought for the Day - The Solstice is Tomorrow - I am near my feeblest.
Yep. Feeble. I better let my bosom companion, Crumby, take over. Crumby waxes nearly as dark and sinister as he ever gets. Take over, bosom companion.
All righty then. Thank ye Ray, my feeble bosom companion. Yes. I am fairly dark and sinister these days. Here I am, huddled in the laboratory, surrounded by the comforting stygian darkness only lit up by the eerie light of the computer monitor plus a couple of electric light bulbs. Anon, I shall rig up the Galileo Gravitator. Then, once it's working normally, I shall switch off the other appliances.
As you may know, the Galileo Gravitator comes supplied with four heavenly bodies. Of these four, out and away the most dark and sinister, at least by connotation, is the Saturn heavenly body, that we address as Bran Bendigeidfran, also known as the Blessed, or original Talking Head. Once I have the Galileo Gravitator rigged up, I shall sit with it in the dark here in the laboratory with the interesting shade dropped, and commune with Bran, the rest of the day.
Bran is the inspiration for all the dark and sinister forces in this part of the universe. He is the prototype for all the hideous, yet kindly, giants, ogres, hump backs, black men, green men, etc., that serve the WG, ineptly. But it is the thought, that counts.
Unbeknownst to many, Raisin Bran was named after Bran. The delicious cereal, Raisin Bran, fourth in importance on my diet after Oatmeal, Grape Nuts, and Puffins, reflects on Bran’s long association with cereal grains in his historic capacity as consort of the WG in her several horticultural iterations. Bran Muffins are also named after Bran. We all know what those muffins can do.
Time passes.
OK. The Galileo Gravitator is working perfectly. Let’s see if I can tune in Bran. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head.
This is the Talking Head. Who’s this?
This is Crumby Ovate, a Druid in Service to the WG. I am located at Red’s Good vs. Evil Cow Barn on Planet Earth. Three big coyote yips, for the dark and sinister. I am like, your biggest fan, Bran Bendigeidfran. And I was wondering, I am trying to get a job working for Trwch Trwyth. You know, the great pig with the insanely valuable hairs that is four times as big as a double wide. Trouble is, I have used up my paltry travel budget for this year, so I can’t go visit with Trwch Trwyth again. Plus, according to everyone I know and respect, like Ray, my bosom companion, and his sister, Dr. Pistrum, Trwch Trwyth, due to his porcine nature, probably can’t read. That surprises me, because, as you yourself undoubtedly know, he can talk, speaking both Welsh and English passably. Naturally, on account of his bilingual-ality I assumed he could read, too. Anyway, turns out he can’t read. So that proposal I sent to him was probably a waste of my time. Thus,I was wondering if you could maybe intercede with Twrch Trwyth on my behalf. Like maybe you could read him my proposal.
Sorry Crumby, I can’t read either.
You can’t!!!!
No, reading came after my hay day. I just memorize everything. Sorry.
Uh! OK. No problem. Easy solution. I’ll just read my proposal to you, you can memorize it, then pass it along to Twrch Twryth. How’s that?
I shall be happy to do that. Will Sunday be time enough fer me to commune with the Mightiest Swine? Tomorrow’s a holiday.
Sure sir. Sunday would be great. Sunday would be like four fifties of big coyote yips. I knew I could count on you, the great, the most magnificent, Bran Bendigeidfran, Talking Head. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you. Praise also the WG, with great Praise!
How is the WG, Crumby?
She’s fine. She may fixing to exterminate lots of the vermin in these parts. So that’s good too.
That’s not what I heard, Crumby. I heard She may light out all together, due to the vermin problem.
Alas. I reckon that is possible. But it may work out to the same difference. We get what we deserve.
Yes, we do. All righty then Crumby, I am pretty busy, so spell your proposal audibly, so I can memorize it.
All righty then!!!! Here we go!
All righty then. Thank ye Ray, my feeble bosom companion. Yes. I am fairly dark and sinister these days. Here I am, huddled in the laboratory, surrounded by the comforting stygian darkness only lit up by the eerie light of the computer monitor plus a couple of electric light bulbs. Anon, I shall rig up the Galileo Gravitator. Then, once it's working normally, I shall switch off the other appliances.
As you may know, the Galileo Gravitator comes supplied with four heavenly bodies. Of these four, out and away the most dark and sinister, at least by connotation, is the Saturn heavenly body, that we address as Bran Bendigeidfran, also known as the Blessed, or original Talking Head. Once I have the Galileo Gravitator rigged up, I shall sit with it in the dark here in the laboratory with the interesting shade dropped, and commune with Bran, the rest of the day.
Bran is the inspiration for all the dark and sinister forces in this part of the universe. He is the prototype for all the hideous, yet kindly, giants, ogres, hump backs, black men, green men, etc., that serve the WG, ineptly. But it is the thought, that counts.
Unbeknownst to many, Raisin Bran was named after Bran. The delicious cereal, Raisin Bran, fourth in importance on my diet after Oatmeal, Grape Nuts, and Puffins, reflects on Bran’s long association with cereal grains in his historic capacity as consort of the WG in her several horticultural iterations. Bran Muffins are also named after Bran. We all know what those muffins can do.
Time passes.
OK. The Galileo Gravitator is working perfectly. Let’s see if I can tune in Bran. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head. Come in Talking Head.
This is the Talking Head. Who’s this?
This is Crumby Ovate, a Druid in Service to the WG. I am located at Red’s Good vs. Evil Cow Barn on Planet Earth. Three big coyote yips, for the dark and sinister. I am like, your biggest fan, Bran Bendigeidfran. And I was wondering, I am trying to get a job working for Trwch Trwyth. You know, the great pig with the insanely valuable hairs that is four times as big as a double wide. Trouble is, I have used up my paltry travel budget for this year, so I can’t go visit with Trwch Trwyth again. Plus, according to everyone I know and respect, like Ray, my bosom companion, and his sister, Dr. Pistrum, Trwch Trwyth, due to his porcine nature, probably can’t read. That surprises me, because, as you yourself undoubtedly know, he can talk, speaking both Welsh and English passably. Naturally, on account of his bilingual-ality I assumed he could read, too. Anyway, turns out he can’t read. So that proposal I sent to him was probably a waste of my time. Thus,I was wondering if you could maybe intercede with Twrch Trwyth on my behalf. Like maybe you could read him my proposal.
Sorry Crumby, I can’t read either.
You can’t!!!!
No, reading came after my hay day. I just memorize everything. Sorry.
Uh! OK. No problem. Easy solution. I’ll just read my proposal to you, you can memorize it, then pass it along to Twrch Twryth. How’s that?
I shall be happy to do that. Will Sunday be time enough fer me to commune with the Mightiest Swine? Tomorrow’s a holiday.
Sure sir. Sunday would be great. Sunday would be like four fifties of big coyote yips. I knew I could count on you, the great, the most magnificent, Bran Bendigeidfran, Talking Head. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you. Praise also the WG, with great Praise!
How is the WG, Crumby?
She’s fine. She may fixing to exterminate lots of the vermin in these parts. So that’s good too.
That’s not what I heard, Crumby. I heard She may light out all together, due to the vermin problem.
Alas. I reckon that is possible. But it may work out to the same difference. We get what we deserve.
Yes, we do. All righty then Crumby, I am pretty busy, so spell your proposal audibly, so I can memorize it.
All righty then!!!! Here we go!
posted by ray pistrum at Friday, December 21, 2007
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