Astroscan or Astroscan Knockoff
OK. As many may recall, I have been considering the purchase of some average amateur astronomy gear that I could easily tote anywhere with little or no exasperation involved. Like I could simply toss that gear into the pee cup next to the terrier and away I’d go. Actually, I have two small Maks that generally fit that bill. But those twain are nearly worthless when it comes to wide view, low power, average amateur astronomy. Plus, their alt-az tripod sucks and is a general pain in the ass. That about covers the polymorphously erotic short comings of that particular tripod.
No. I need something like really easy, a honest to Goddess three hole slut. I thought seriously about binoculars. But I already have perhaps the best binoculars ever made, the Nikon SE 10x42. And I thought, shit fuck man, you shall never be satisfied with some goofy big old bins that require a tripod anyway and probably suck in cat turds optically.
Once I thought all that, I about gave up on my original thought. But then the WG came to me in a dream. What you need Crumby, is an Astroscan or an Astroscan knockoff! Let Me, illustrate.
Then the Goddess did an ad, fer me, featuring an Astroscan and an Astroscan knockoff. The ad was in technicolor. All that was visible in the ad was the average amateur astronomer equipment and the beautiful hands and plump arms of the WG pointing out various features. The beautiful hands of the Goddess gently fondled the average amateur equipment. Her beautifully manicured painted nails pointed to this or that interesting feature. By the time the ad ended, I was sold on the purchase of an Astroscan or Astroscan knockoff. I could barely wait to wake up. Yes. I needed to wake up and check out the offerings on EBAY.
Ever since that night, I’ve been on EBAY,
Struggling through the night,
Right there on EBAY
Wondering through the night,
Was my bid high enough!
Good Goddess! I am still fixing to try and win an Astroscan or Astroscan knockoff at a reasonable price on EBAY. You’d think that in a goddess damned depression like the one we are currently mired in, that would be easy. But is it easy? Fuck me in the anus! Course it’s not easy!!!! Nothing, in a depression is ever, easy.
No. I need something like really easy, a honest to Goddess three hole slut. I thought seriously about binoculars. But I already have perhaps the best binoculars ever made, the Nikon SE 10x42. And I thought, shit fuck man, you shall never be satisfied with some goofy big old bins that require a tripod anyway and probably suck in cat turds optically.
Once I thought all that, I about gave up on my original thought. But then the WG came to me in a dream. What you need Crumby, is an Astroscan or an Astroscan knockoff! Let Me, illustrate.
Then the Goddess did an ad, fer me, featuring an Astroscan and an Astroscan knockoff. The ad was in technicolor. All that was visible in the ad was the average amateur astronomer equipment and the beautiful hands and plump arms of the WG pointing out various features. The beautiful hands of the Goddess gently fondled the average amateur equipment. Her beautifully manicured painted nails pointed to this or that interesting feature. By the time the ad ended, I was sold on the purchase of an Astroscan or Astroscan knockoff. I could barely wait to wake up. Yes. I needed to wake up and check out the offerings on EBAY.
Ever since that night, I’ve been on EBAY,
Struggling through the night,
Right there on EBAY
Wondering through the night,
Was my bid high enough!
Good Goddess! I am still fixing to try and win an Astroscan or Astroscan knockoff at a reasonable price on EBAY. You’d think that in a goddess damned depression like the one we are currently mired in, that would be easy. But is it easy? Fuck me in the anus! Course it’s not easy!!!! Nothing, in a depression is ever, easy.
posted by ray pistrum at Thursday, March 12, 2009
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