That Didn't Work

Interestingly, right after Crumby rode all over with his Seiko kinetic taped to the front wheel spokes of the red Blade, that particular Seiko tested at full charge and should have been wound or wired for between 7 and 14 days of carefree watch observation. But then, a while later as Crumby tested again, the charge dropped. Then it dropped still more. Then, anon, that watch stopped ticking. Mercy! The only way that watch runs is if Crumby runs or rides with the watch taped to the bike wheel spokes. Dang!

So the miserable watch capacitor is not merely dead. It is sincerely dead.

All righty. Almost a decade after the fact (small bs may escape even the most alert Ovate) Crumby has discovered that his Seiko kinetic was yet another defective product the land of the Rising Sun foisted off on the ignorant yet helpless Americano consumer. Hirohito's revenge.

But there is always Hope. Hope springs eternal. This time Hope is dressed up as a Lithium Ion replacement battery which subs for the inert capacitor.

Huh-huh. Buy this kinetic watch. You shall never need to change the battery. Jeez Louise! Until you need a new battery.

The world of watch repair must be an arcane world. It's like Godzilla meets Jason on an internet dating venue. It's like Frankenstein fixing to get his monster up and running for the first time. Yet replicated a billion times on Amazon and Youtube. It's like that old song. How did it go? Oh yes. Fart me a gas cloud. Fart me a gas cloud. I'll fart a gas cloud over you.

Yes. Crumby is fixing to fix his Seiko kinetic by himself. Crazy. Crazy. Crazy. Crazy. Already, Crumby has ordered the replacement battery which comes with a free anti-static tweezer. What a deal! Then there's the rest of the tools. Oh yes, minimally, one needs special tools besides the anti-static tweezer. One needs a special type of goofy watch wrench. One needs a watch case holder. One probably requires a spring bar removal tool to get the dang band off the dern watch. One may (probably) need a table vice to stick the case holder in while one cranks on the watch back with the special watch wrench.

All these speical tools are now available from the far east as well as from Switzerland. Hmm. There is someting of a price differential. Hmm. Hold it. How about some measurements buddies? Like the little opposite slots on Crumby's kinetic watch are in the neighborhood of 33mm apart. Can your dern Swiss tool span a 33mm gap? Nobody knows until after they buy your dang, stinking tool.

Are monopoly capitalism and imperialism actually helping the average, downtrodden Americano dumbass? Nobody knows. Or do they? Mercy!