How Does a Loser Ever Win?

Yes.  The Bee Gees wondered over this conundrum, but never got an answer.  So how does a loser win, ever?  Easy that, buddy.  Any loser, even the most miserable, can turn it around totally with a Buy It Now deal or item on EBAY.

For example, the Crumby Ovate recently suffered through such a losing streak that the sad sack ovate was starting to think of himself as a complete loser.  Then what happens?  Suddenly Crumby espies this Wenger, the one on the left.  Check it out, a 1950s Wenger.  It was a Buy It Now item.  Which Crumby did, Buy It Now.  Instantly, Crumby was transformed from loser to winner, with a congratulatory e-mail form EBAY to prove it. It was like a miracle, but better.

A day before the elderly Wenger arrived at the CB, the knife on the right, a Victorinox Marlboro Illuminator (Illuminators sport red LEDS) also showed up.  It had been lost in the mail for 25 days somewhere between these parts and Tennessee.  Crumby is very happy it finally arrived.  More proof that Crumby is a winner.

Crumby should point out that the old Wenger is not a perfect specimen.  The saw has a piece missing which includes the north end of the nail nick.  That's why the tie is there, so Crumby can pull the saw out.  Otherwise it's in pretty good shape for such an elderly knife.

The Illuminator is mint, although its box got rough treatment in the mail.

Noah the Movie, an Important Review

Crumby was fixing to write up a diatribe about St. Patrick (SP) vs. the Faeries.  But he missed the “green” day.  So what’s the point.  Besides, everybody knows SP claimed to be a pagan killer.  Why should we publicize that?

So, with a new Christian/Jew mega-movie out, Crumby decided to switch from SP to Noah.  Because Noah, may have been responsible for importing the regular pig, (Sus scrofa domesticus) to Wales, enabling the Welsh to do, something or other, eventually, maybe.  Actually, the Arkite theory is that Noah, while sailing about, made port somewhere in Wales, and dropped off the pigs.  Presumably, Wales was by then already saved from the flood or fairly dried out, but still featuring a great many potential wallows.  So from that day to this, the pigs and the Welsh are considered commensal.

Eventually, the pigs, finding themselves constrained or hemmed in unnecessarily in a mere fraction of  the southwest of the British Isles, immigrated just about everywhere, even to Jerusalem, China and Iceland (still rare when compared to sheep).  In far Jerusalem those particular pigs became infested with Demons.  Mercy!   Probably the low humidity and great heat contributed to the Demon infestation the pigs suffered from during their time dwelling in the harsh, sere conditions in those parts of the Roman Empire. Pigs don’t much like hot, dry weather.  Plus, those parts had plenty of Demons in the first place.

Meantime Noah needed to repopulate the planet except for those high altitude locations where the wicked had survived in spite of the flood.  And while it is certain that all people dwelling at that time in the imaginary land of Gonnorhea, where Noah was from, were totally wicked or evil, and got drowned like rats, further out from that area Gonnorhea, areas largely ignored by Jehovah, the people, like in Wales, were only ignorant of Jehovah, and therefore, not knowingly evil.  Well.  Some of them were probably evil totally, but not knowingly.   So even though they were totally evil, it didn’t count.

Many may have noticed by now that Crumby has not actually seen the movie, Noah.  The fact is, Crumby has not even seen the trailer for Noah all the way through.  So this review will be continued once the movie, Noah,  has devolved to the small screen, also known as TV.

Spring Ebbs and Flows

For the first time in Crumby's faulty memory, an American Robin has been singing a territory within earshot of the CB.  This has been going on for several days.  Interestingly, robins were very scarce in these parts this winter.  Yet now, one is singing away, every day.  Crumby hopes they nest.  Actually, Crumby sometimes espies robins during the summer months while riding his bike around south Austink.  So they most likely do nest nearby.

It's Like Talking to Myself, Only I Can Go Back, and Read What I Said

Recently, Crumby acquired two new SAKs.  It's the nature of SAK collecting to acquire new ones.  What a hobby!

Here those twain are, a Spartan Lite and a Cybertool 29.   Crumby likes the Spartan Lite very much.  Not only is it, after it got cleaned up, a nice knife with a working torch,  but it came with a Tinker that also, eventually cleaned up, with considerable elbow grease.  Yes.  That transaction was easy and worthwhile.  Two nice SAKS for a low price and a little elbow grease.

But then we come to the Cybertool 29.   Crumby paid a little too much for it.  Plus, Crumby had already got skunked out of a bunch of Cybertools on EBAY before he WON this particular Cybertool.  Which made Crumby wonder if acquiring a Cybertool in the first place was worth all the trouble.  So Crumby is resentful over the Cybertool, as he always is when he feels like he worked too hard for something.

It's weird.  Crumby has always felt like, if an average person had to work too hard for something, he or she would always resent or maybe hate that item or maybe organic entity in the end.  Of course, Crumby's theory flies in the face of common sense, which opines or whines that the harder an average person works for something, the more he or she will appreciate that something.  What bullshit common sense is!  Sad that many believe, or pretend to believe, in common sense.  Dumb asses. Mercy on me, for the dumb asses.

Alas, the Cybertool 29 has a logo on it.  A logo is not a prime directive for a collector like Crumby.  Particularly a logo for a bunch of punks that sold out to the capitalist running dogs in China.  Mercy!  Crumby needs a new scale for his Cybertool 29.  But that will only add to its exorbitant cost.

Spring Comes and Goes at the CB

Amphion floridensis at Aesculus arguta

SAK Tools Missing from Crumby’s Collection

Crumby tried half-heartedly to put this list in a better format, but soon gave up.

Victorinox Wenger

Butane lighter Choke tube tool
Cigar cutter Cigar cutter
Cleat Wrench
Club Face Cleaner
Divot Repair Tool Divot Repair Tool
Fishhook Ceramic/Diamond Coated
Fingernail Clipper
Hoof Cleaner
Laser Pointer Laser Pointer
Marlinspike Marlinspike
Nail File/Long Nail File/Long
Orienteering Tool (Compass/Rule)
Sacking Needle
Saw Disc
Phillips Flat Screwdriver
Shackle Opener Shackle Opener
Shoe Spike wrench
Ski Wax Scraper
Telescopic Pointer
USB Flash Drive
Whistle
Altimeter/Barometer
Ball Marker Ball marker

Clock-Digital
Stroke Counter
Stylus
Watch-Analog

This list is depressingly long for a tool-centirc collector similar to the Crumby Ovate. Like Crumby could possibly imagine himself employing the Telescopic Pointer, a Laser or the Orienteering Tool.   He would like a Victorinox Whistle to complement his Wenger Whistle.  How can Crumby get along without a clock/watch fixed in a knife scale?    Even the notoriously defective Victorinox Butane Lighter tempts Crumby.

Yes.  A real too-centric collector is super red hot for all these missing tools.  Is Crumby  a real collector?  Well is he?

Probably Crumby may eventually acquire some of these tools, even though many of them are out of production,  if he can get them at reasonable prices.  That is, Crumby might go for all the ones not directly related to cigars, equines, football, golf, sail repair or skiing.

Ball Marker!  It's a marks-a-lot and a small mirror.  Stroke Counter!

Another Prodigal Tinker

In between losing all those Cybertools on EBAY (see previous entry)  Crumby won a Spartan Lite and a Tinker.  They were a group, damaged goods, according to the vendor.  The big blade on the Spartan was afflicted with tar, which cleaned up with Naptha.  The light and everything else works OK.  So Crumby got a bargain on the Spartan Lite.  However, all the blades were frozen on the Tinker.  The Tinker we are now discussing is the blue one pictured.  Besides the frozen blades, upon arrival the toothpick, of all things, was stuck in its slot. Crumby had to employ needle nose pliers to get it out.

Now, after baths in A1 (the oil not the steak sauce) and WD-40, the blades all open, yet the can opener layer tools are still sticky.   Also, apparently a previous responsible party either dropped the knife on its toothpick end from a height, or used that end for a hammer leaving the scales and liners on the end slightly goofed up, and explaining why the toothpick gets stuck.  Crumby may need to disassemble and re-pin this particular Tinker.

The red Tinker depicted must have been tempted out from hiding by the arrival of a potential mate.  Crumby was hunting down and killing evil Eurasian weeds along the east fence when his trusty hand pick upturned this long lost Tinker.  Oddly,  the blue Tinker was in Crumby's jacket pocket at the time, all greasy and wrapped in a paper towel.

Life as we know it;  Crumby has no Tinkers.   Then, anon, he has two.  It's like the famous saying,  If it aint one thing, it's two.

The red Tinker is in mighty bad shape.  Even after soaking all night in A1, the tools are all stuck.  And the red Tinker has no toothpick at all.  Crumby is fixing to take it apart today, clean it and put it back together, possibly with an extra tool included.  Like maybe it will get scissors, turning it into a Super Tinker, or Stinker.

Aggravation or Something Else?

As many know, Crumby collects SAK tools.  Yet one of the SAK tools Crumby has not collected is the Cybertool apparatus.  But not for want of trying.  No. No. No. No.

Crumby attempted to win four different Cybertool apparati Sunday.  No. No. No.  No.  Yet every time poor Crumby attempted to win, he lost.  Loser.  Loser.  Loser.  Loser.  That’s four losses in a row on EBAY for the Crumby Ovate.   Seems like the WG may feel like Crumby does not deserve a Cybertool.   Mercy, Goddess.  Mercy!

Everybody likes a winner, maybe. Crumby likes a winner.  But only if Crumby is the winner.  While nobody likes a loser.  What good is a loser?   No good at all.  Losers are evil.  Note: If Crumby had won, one of those Cybertools, the discussion we are now having would not be taking place.

How should we consider the EBAY reality; only in the context of EBAY, or as a tiny part of a more universal schema of right vs. wrong, wins vs. losses, good vs. evil?  Probably, many do not want to go there.
My Goddess, the last throes of monopoly capitalism, prior to its utter flop into barbaric Hades, is lots of fun

Super Nova in M32

Is there such a thing, astronomically, as a nova?   Like maybe small, dim suns go nova.  Or maybe they are all super nova, to distinguish those exploding stars from the Chevy Nova. Could be.

Crumby needs to make a note that during one clear night last week he went out and espied the super nova in M82.  It was still visible in the CB's extremely light polluted skies on that night.  In 10" Newt at 25x  use averted vision, at 50x it's continuously visible.